oldmilwaukee6er

Such a tough ask for a collector... Wearable art.

The People’s Holiday It has been a busy week, though more in life than comic books. The Mr Natch #1 and new Robt Williams Vans drained the Paypal balance, and with my part-time teaching gig winding down at the end of the month, I was considered cancelling my pull list and going back to scavenging off the rack each WED like a n3wb. The IRL Wednesday One. The minimalist in my mind likes that, but I also have been really enjoying buying Moderns in the latest comic boom. So, I have been working on a more serious job hunt, as I do want to move away from teaching into something that I can leave behind at 5-6pm (and be done with it; aka no grading). A week ago THURS I got the chance to interview with an established 501(3)c for a project manager position with good fringe, which I really thought was more of a long shot. SUN was Mighty Con Milwaukee. New layout, some real guests- like Larry Hama and James O Barr. Costume contests. It was going to be crazy. My lil picker buddy Jimmy D was setting up with two tables and was bugging me to set up too. It would have been a great show to see it all unfold from behind a $20 table, but I am lazy and already committed invitations to the lady and chef. So we got together later, just after 1pm and headed over. We arrived just before 2pm and there was a line out the door of Serb Hall still! I do not know if they were at capacity and trickling people in, but that’s what it seemed. Groups of 4 or 6 going in at a time. A line. At a local con. At 2pm. Now that is Zeitgeist. We moved through it quickly and I ended up picking a stack of $1 Grendels for the lady (off her new want list), a schweet Spawn Ashley Wood Angela cover ($5), a small stack of 50c readers, and a loose 2004 TMNT Usagi Yojimbo action figure with 2 of 4 weapons ($5). 2004 TMNT Usagi action figure with two wakizushi blades; swivel action so Usagi finishes in his "kill pose" (Cannot wait to find this MOC in the wild someday) Spawn #100 Wood variant for $5; great Angela cover MON hung out with the chef (the lady gave him her copy of Fallout 4), WED was new comic day (3 for the lady- Jem, Assassin’s Creed, & Munchkin), WED afternoon I had a new job offer on the table and so we celebrated with dinner at a local supper club style place. THURS we went to 414 Music (local band feature) for a free show of one of our fave local bands- Soul Low. Met one of my disc gold buddies there and we went over to a club in Walker’s Point (a 99c drink special from 7-15pm; beat the clock) before heading back to our side of town, Brady Street, for another friend’s DJ set. Rowdy! FRI was grading all day and then preparation for the Riverwest 24, a 24-hour bicycle race in traffic through the neighborhoods of Riverwest. While a bicycle race, it is meant to promote community within the neighborhood and it is also a giant party, with street parties continuing throughout the night. AKA The People's Holiday. I rode with my old college buddy, a local community pastor, the lady and his asst pastor on a “B” team of 4 (four people; four bikes). There are A teams (2-6 ppl; 1 bike); B teams (2-6 ppl; each has own bike); individual (M or F), and Tandem. The ‘suggested route’ is just over 4.6 miles. The route has 4 mandatory checkpoints that you have to hit in order, and get a manifest punched. Punch 1-4 in order along the route and you have completed a lap (approx. 4.6mi). THEN… there are approximately 15 bonus checkpoints that you can hit along (or off) the route at various businesses, parks, & churches. Each bonus checkpoint is worth 4 laps, including one bonus checkpoint (the RW24 tattoo) worth 5pts. Complete all the bonus checkpoints and earn 5 extra laps, or the tattoo, but not both. For our team, the pastor always gets the tattoos (his 5th RW24, our 3rd). For our team… we stick to the community aspect and generally try to keep the manifest on the course as much as possible. Those are our rules. The pastor’s tattoo time was 430AM SAT, so he was going to take some midnight laps and bonus checkpoints, which was perfect as we ended up sleeping 130AM-500AM. Our times to ride ended up being FRI night (as our bikes have lights and we are more experienced) and then SAT morning and SAT afternoon. In 24 hours, we did 27 laps (127.2 miles), 53 bonus laps (12 bonus checkpoints plus the tattoo), for a total of 80, which put us in the 66th percentile for all teams. It was so much fun! I did 9 total laps and a bunch of side missions, including canoeing the Milwaukee River, reciting poetry (and painting a rock), creating a limerick, working a kids ride & fitness (leg/arm presses & burpies). Generally, I met my goal of riding 40mi; it was tough to get a clean lap in, but my best time was sub 22 minute lap on my 6th. I did have equipment problems. We had to lean on my lights throughout the night and so they are worn down. My old Lake SPD clipless shoes are totally shot, I had to canoe shoeless because one shoe’s clip was stripped and locked onto the pedal. My seat gave me fits on half a lap, but I took to making sure it was tight and it rode fine after that. So… some new equipment is in order next paycheck- new lights, new shoes, & an updated helmet. SUN was recovering and finalizing grading; opening up my next online class. MON (today) is more of the same. Plus lunch with former co-workers and then an advance showing of Suicide Squad (I created an acct at wbtickets and entered a code from a local radio station). So the lady and I will check it out to a, no doubt, packed house. PS >> Binging on Mr. Robot on Amazon Prime (season 1 is free) PPS >> Suddenly, I am very busy with two online courses and a new job beginning. It is an exciting time, but I think this week I will review my 2016 goals, see how far I have progressed and set my priorities before Wizard World Chicago. It has officially been a year of journaling and it is time for a process-check.

That Air Pirates #2 is a beauty... and seems to be the tougher of the two to find in high grade. 129 copies in the census for #1 59 copies for #2... though there are 9.8s in existence for both books.

Great idea for a journal! Your excitement for u-comix will no doubt be infectious. wpbooks posted this over in Magazines... but in honor of your Haight Ashbury pedigreed book!

Nice pull erehwon! Wow... that image spurred another memory. These books were at San Diego Comic Con in 2007! Carbo had the Mowry copies of Zap Comix #1 Plymell at three tiers 500 750 1000 I bought the best $750 copy (graded CGC 2.0 blue label w/ CROW pages; sold for 1600 in 2009) Carbo and Fogel also had CGC file copies of C*nt Comics in both white paper and newsprint. I bought a CGC 9.2 newsprint for 250 And 2-3 VF or better high grade "Heads First miscut" Zap Comix #2 (~$400), of which I heard 50c may have purchased one? That was a good year for undergrounds.

Mr. Natural #1 1st. 43 universal copies in the census; 3 in 8.5; 23 higher

Nice felix! A little something to look forward to with all the wildfire swirling about. Cheers to low pressure systems and falling temperatures!

Vans Shoes x Zap Comix artist Robert Williams Soundtrack: More info: http://www.vans.com/vault2.html# The Lady clued me in to the news that Robert Williams (painter, cartoonist, and founder of Juxtapoz Magazine) teamed up with skate shoe manufacturer Vans to create footwear renditions of three Williams's paintings- "Flaming Cobra," "Jalepeña" & "Malfeasance." One painting paired to one classic Vans silhouette (from L to R)- the Sk8-Hi , Slip-On, & Authentic. Williams is a part of the Zap Comix collective, joining the series with issue #4 (along with Spain Rodriguez) and doing cover work for #5 & #11. Per the Wiki “his mix of California car culture, cinematic apocalypticism, and film noir helped to create a new genre of psychedelic imagery.” Known collectors of his art include Nicolas Cage, Leonardo DiCaprio, Artie Shaw, Debbie Harry, Anthony Kiedis, Von Dutch, Stanislav Szukalski, Ed Ruscha, and Timothy Leary. I like the clear rubber soles with the painting’s imagery. I first became aware of Williams’ art from my cassette tape of Appetite for Destruction by Guns n Roses c. 1987 (at the formative age of 13… nipple!). I always wished I had the Vaughn (Mark) Bode Puma shoes from c 2007, and if Jim Mahfood would move away from sweet lady gams and get into sneakers (maybe he has), I would be all “shut up & take my money!!” But that will probably not happen for a while... So I popped on a pair of the light blue Authentic “Malfeasance” from Sole Classics out of Columbus, OH (props). While the light blue is not my favorite color, I love the environmental imagery and I kinda wanted to go “all-in.” I mean if I am going to pay sneakerhead prices, I want me some sneakerhead flash. As such, I picked up a T-shirt too (the black Coochy Cooty design; not pictured). Coochy Cooty was Robert Williams’ underground comix antihero (after the Wiki), introduced in 1970 Coochy Cooty Men's Comics and Zap Comix #5. I mostly used my Paypal balance, which technically knocks the ASM1 fund back down, though maybe I can lobby the lady for general funds. I predict the "Jalepeña" Slip-On will be the first to sell out and the most popular. However, slip ons are just not for me. I like the look of them, but they are just not a practical shoe for me. If you do pop on a pair, I suggest using the keyword search ‘Vans Vault Online’ to find an online retailer as these seem limited to just few stores nationwide. The Hypebeast interview with Robt Williams: http://hypebeast.com/2016/7/robert-williams-vault-by-vans-collection Zap Comix #5 1st. 30 universal copies in the census; 5 in 9.4; 5 higher Zap Comix #11 1st. 7 universal copies in the census; 1 in 9.4; 1 higher

After BrotherJ...

No it does not, it has a distilled version of Kennedy 1982, which is "1970, 1st, 50c, Printed by Apex Novelties on IFC, BC art is 5.5 inches wide" Do you mean the lower left hand corner FC of a Mr. Natural #1 1st printing will ALWAYS have that triangular "scuff" of non-color? You taught me that... right? I admit to looking at the backcover art long and hard before popping on this book because of the new case & the fact that the FC cover scuff is slightly less pronounced in this copy / image. It gave me just a shade of doubt for a minute.

Small update- Bought this off eBay for well under guide for a raw Fine. It is a nice upgrade to my CGC 6.5 copy. New case issues are likely no problem for an 8.5, but it will be fun to hold it in hand, scan it, and decide whether to crack/mylar or reholder at Wizard World Chicago. The hot weather is breaking slightly and I hope tonight sinks down into the high 60s. Swam in the lake FRI, so beautifully cold (water temp around 55 degrees). Says it is up to 63 degrees today, but I doubt it. Mighty Con was SUN. Went with the chef (lady stayed home) and I spent about $60 on mostly $1 books (lots of Grendel for the lady off her new want list). The chef was shut out. The lady is experiencing con fatigue. I do not blame her. Mostly grinding on my online class and job hunting these days. Two decent interviews last week, so the wheels are in motion. Gonna sip a coldie and watch Straight Outta Compton on HBO. That’s the news from Lake Wobegone, where the lady is 100 hours into Dragon Age Inquisition, the Om is leaning into his part-time status, and the kids are my sister's problem. PS. It has almost been one year to the day since I started the journal.

50- Thanks for sharing further explanation of your thought process. It is nice to see the information laid out after all these years, even if I still have reservations. PS. I empathize with your falling out of underground reseach. I did the same thing; lost a lot of drive in that area and (largely) stopped buying on eBay. Moderns seem to give me more joy these days. And even more joy is the simple hunt to find comics in the wild.

(Qualifier- I know this wasn't directed at me) I see your point WP, though for the record I have only ever bought two copies of FFFB 2 and have never bought a copy of BA 1 ... indeed I have stayed away from these books because of all this mess. So, I can honestly tell you... I am not living in denial. I simply understand the difference between hypothesis, evidence, theory and fact. And I can see the embedded assumptions in all of this (and am only hoping others do as well).

50c- I am curious about the following assumptions... 1. If a book has pages out of order, it must be an earlier printing (e.g. BA 1) 2. If a book has matte (or glossy) cover stock, it must be an earlier printing (e.g. FFFB 2) 3. If a book has an ad for an ealier underground, it must be an earlier printing (e.g. FFFB 2) 4. If said ad is slightly lower quality, then it must be an earlier printing (e.g. FFFB 2) 5. If a book has a manufacturing defect, like a rolling blotch of color or a roaming print line, it may be an earlier printing (e.g. FFFB 1 or 2) While some of these were established via data sources some 50 years ago (and by an author that had far more 1st hand information)... why assume that this is always the case going forward? My MAIN problem is that the F UGG15 sets these as certainities for BA 1 and FFFB 2 (AKA distinct printings; sans #5 of course), when in reality it is conjecture. My

Neatstuff had one of these back in the day. I think it came from Donahue when Carbo purchased the Mowry Zaps and a buncha Donahue stock. There was another that was partially white, perhaps?

Vote with your dollar Soundtrack: New comic WED and the start of a new heat wave. Today touched over 90 degrees. I’m not sure if I have written about it before, but we do not have air conditioning. We live in a 2-bedroom on the bluff of Lake Michigan, with windows on three sides of our condo. And since we moved here from Louisiana, the first two summers swept by without issue. Since 2010 or so, however, we have begun to acclimate to the more northern clime; our blood thickening. Normally, we can take advantage of our proximal position to the lake and ability to capture the prevailing breeze. But when temperatures reach into the high 80s, we simply seal the place up and trap the cooler air in. Until night, and then cool the place off as much as possible. Keeping to this pattern, I am fond of saying that “there are really only about 8 nights a year when I wish I had A/C.” So, for the next three days that may well mean simply sealing the place up, period. It is not worth it to cool the place down if the nighttime temperatures are in the 80s. At ANY rate, we choose not to have air conditioning, just like we choose not to do a great many things. Most of the people in our building have 1-2 window units, and I get it; just understand that we choose to live without. We vote with our dollar, just like anyone else. Once, our toaster died. Rather than buy a new one, we made our toast in the oven for a year. While bragging about this to my 100-year old grandmother, she turned to me and said “Justin. Go and buy a new toaster. They cost $15.” So... stubborn to a fault. I cannot precisely explain it (I know the 2005 hurricane season was formative), but I suppose feel compelled to write about it anyway, in part because of an interaction between myself and my sisters over 4th of July. The plaster ceiling in our great room is slowly cracking and will eventually collapse. This is a known issue in the building, as the nails used in construction were slightly too short. It is also a known issue in our space, as the repairs done by previous owners have slowly began to fail. I know what I must do, and I have saved the money to address the issue (separate even from my ASM fund)… but I am paralyzed to act. Sound familiar? Lost in collecting ceiling repairs? I write this because I know the lack of air conditioning accentuates the problem. And so I think about it a little more in the heat of summer. And the younger sister asks me about it constantly. Mostly, it does not bother me. However, she cornered me in front of my mom and oldest sister and proceeded to drill me about the ceiling. I get it; it would bother her. She would open a new credit card to pay for it and it would be fixed; appearances kept up. However, I am not like her. I just grin and bear it and say simply “you are right; I have no excuse… I have the money and the time.” Which no doubt made her want to pursue me all the more. [You should see how worked up she gets when I tell her how I have not let the property assessor into our condo since we bought it in 2009. She “but your property keeps getting assessed down.” Me “yeah and I pay less in property taxes.” She “but aren’t you worried that when you go to sell, you won’t get as much?” Me “what do I care what it is assessed at while I am living here? ‘Sides the bank will magically assess it at whatever the purchase price.”] However, we are simply different in this regard. In lieu of a logic of domination, similarities and differences are just that. And we all vote with our dollar. PS >> I sold the following books the past month to a high grade collector and boardie. He has made no bones about putting together the best set of CGC Freak Brothers he can, and that search led him to this journal and my registry. CGC 9.2 Freak Brothers #1 (top 10 copy; $1000) CGC 9.6 Freak Bros #7 (tied highest; $150) CGC 9.8 Freak Bros #9 (single highest; $250) It is tough to let my uber high grade Freaks go, but I still have a few undercopy slabs (Sucha News) and a few raw copies. Still it is tough to willingly give up these books, as this was an active goal of mine. However, it is healthy. And I have not regretted it (indeed it has lent a little extra peace of mind RE ceiling). PPS >> The sales officially bring my Amazing Spiderman #1 savings up to $3300; enough to start day-dreaming about actual copies.

[Written TUES AM] The last two nights have been cool and nice, which has helped my recovery from all that disc golf. Oddly enough my arm and shoulder were not the problems. Getting out of bed the last two mornings have revealed just how much leg work hiking 7 disc gold courses can be. My arm actually feels much stronger as a result of all the disc golf (and becoming jokingly larger than my non-throwing arm, much like a baseball pitcher). I started playing disc golf in college c. 1997 at two courses near Missoula, MT- Blue Mountain and Rattlesnake Canyon. Back then we used to play with one disc and flip our putts with that same disc. Once I discovered disc golf, I stopped playing straight golf. I traded my clubs away and forever was a disc golf convert. $8 for a disc and one could play for free. I played throughout my college years, and recruited friends to play beginning in Louisiana. Louisiana had a really good scene of local tournaments that were PDGA approved, and so I played as an amateur there (twice placing 2nd). Milwaukee has strong courses… when I first moved here in 2008, I played Brown Deer (18). It along with Dretzka Park (27) helped host the world championships in the early oughts. There was also Dineen Park (18; more open park course) for the winter. Soon, the county built courses Estabrook Park and Root River Parkway and then monetized it to $5 per day or $40/year the last two years. So ANYways… today [TUES] is cooler, which is nice… cool down the apt before the next heat wave. I usually wake up at 4am to strategically position the window fans to cool down our space. Then seal up the house and blinds through the worst of it. Rinse and repeat. Exercise is pretty easy during heat waves, early, because a nice cold shower and a window fan helps right away. But once cooled, I do very little around the house during the heat of the day. It helps to have an A/C cooled office, but I lose that buffer at the end of the month. And of course, if it gets unbearable… there is always the lake. Currently, the lake temperature is a brisk 55 degrees. This morning I look forward to sipping an iced coffee, scanning some comic books [didn't do it], and catching up in my online science course.

FRI - SUN was a disc golf weekend with 3 friends, all fellow discers 7 courses 113 holes And 2 breweries- Three Floyd’s & Bell’s – through the heart of Michigan Not a single round started before noon (slackers), so we played until dark (10EST) and then usually had to scrounge for a sports bar for pub grub. FRI – 3 Floyd’s >> Lake Township Park (18) >> Oshtemo Township (10+) >> AirBnB near Michigan St campus SAT – Grand Woods Park (21) >> Fitzgerald Park ($5; 18) >> Great Lakes Christian College (9) >> Frank’s Press Box SUN – Robert Morris Park ($5; 18) >> Vicksburg Recreation Area (18) >> Bell’s Eclectic Café Gonna sleep for a week

Update- this order of 10 books w/ free shipping appears to have been split into 4 different shipments. Interesting.

Wednesday One (for each) for 7/13/16- One book each Audio: http://www.npr.org/2016/07/13/485723740/diversity-drives-the-story-in-the-latest-incarnation-of-superman For the lady… Jet City’s Mayhem & Magic (Fine / DeCampi; not pictured) Pour moi… Rebirth New Super-Man #1 (2nd Kenan Kong; cameo Batman & Wonder-Woman of China) So, now that I am entering my 3rd month with the ability to scour Previews for more obscure titles and the lady picked up this book to try. Since last week was pretty big pull for me, this was the only book waiting at the LCS. However, I had read the following article from CBSI on New Super-Man and so I was mildly curious to see if it was in stock and available at my small LCS. And I didn’t get down there until late right before close, so I grew curiouser and curiouser still. There were several copies and the wee LCS had ordered well, which indicates to me that this book is (like predicted here on these boards) over 100k copies. Still, I picked up one of each cover on spec and as a makeweight so I could use my debit card (minimum $10). My spec is that this is potential intellectual property for billions of Asias… and even if it sells well and flops, it may come around in a big way within 15 years. ANYways… there was also a good article over at CBSI about the fatigue that is starting to set in with some collectors and the debate over what constitutes a first appearance vs cameo. I get it. In my first foray into comics… the heady Valiant and Image days. I was not well versed in this and punch-drunk on a 3-longbox investment for $300 I had nickel and dimed my way to (including 100 Spawn #1s). I did not collect or know about Silver Age books, or seek out first appearances of well-known characters. So the first time I held a Hulk #180 in my hand (Burnham Bowl c. 2010)… I was blown away to see Wolverine named, in darn-near FULL SPLASH at the end of the book! WTF! And so it begins. It seems to me the definition is… 1. The character/person/entity/creature (herein character) must be seen in full or nearly full. No smiles, hands, etc. The character should be pictured. 2. The character should be named (or named in the past). 3. The character should be part of the story, i.e. no last page cliffhanger. #IH180 Just like in soccer… either you are playing the ball, or you are playing the man. Play the man, and it’s a foul. If all three of the above criteria are not present then it is a cameo. These three criteria would eliminate probably 95% of the debate (and to be fair this likely represents the current status quo). Now, there was always be the odd <5%… the debate about #3, what constitutes story, or the character that drives plot and is shown but is unnamed. This is o-kay. That said… this is the 2nd appearance Kenan Kong and cameo Batman & Wonder-Woman of China. Long live the comic boom! Up Next- Warm weather and an update on the ASM1 fund

Strongly agreed!

My theory is... AT LEAST a -2.0 grade deduction for the writing on the cover. Arnie (gooddr) had a Plymell that was signed by Crumb... exact same thing. They slabbed it old label 8.0. It's an old school CGC thing. THIS WAS SO.. .the book itself could qualify as a blue label (downgraded for writing versus "qualified")... so that when the second signature hit, it could get Yellow SS. I am just guessing, but can imagine, if Howard was presented with the option between Qualified Green or SS Yellow... he wanted that Yellow label. Just not many people doing SS undergrounds. This is a classic case of 'buy the book and not the label.' That books presents KILLER and has two great sigs

wink, wink, nudge, nudge My two major contributions to that guide. 50c- To be fair. Yeah, I took two shots in that post, though I honestly didn't know who the first one was directed at (though I suspected based on past activity around FFFB2). For what it is worth, I long ago decided not to venture into Big #1 because of the questions with the book and given the money that book commands (really no pony in that race). And I did say that I threw my other two guides away and was using the F UG 15 (and also am aware of your excellent contributions via Fogel/O40, whereas mine was very low this time). I am excited to review the information that you shared. Because I do have a strong affinity for Freak Brothers #2. Was it posted before? As a way of background, my views are thus... 1) Kennedy was 34 years closer to the sources and almost 50 years closer to the source material. Any changes to the seminal guide should not be taken lightly. 2) Given that... Changes to the actual printing process (plates, ads, etc) have far more weight than paper stock, staple configuration or any color variation. Based on what we know, one can possibly re-engineer the printing process using the former, but likely NOT the latter without credible evidence (which, unfortunately, we are losing every day). 3) With possible exception w/ FFFB2 ... which (as you no doubt know *Ed- you have illustrated) was blobbed on manually and can result in all sorts of variations from beautiful rainbow, to purple green, to brownish (by the end of the blob).

The Lady Speaks. . . Pokémon Go! I am not playing this game. I will most likely never play this game. For one, I am a bit paranoid about my phone’s battery life and really don’t want any app that will drain it. Secondly, I have no interest in the game beyond pop culture observation. OK, that said… I hope the hype dies down by September or I’m going to have a lot of pissed off 18-23 year olds when they lose attendance points due to the game. (So far only Skyrim has had such a negative impact on my students. It came out right at finals of Fall Quarter 2011 and I failed many a student for not showing up. Not even Fallout 4 was as detrimental.) The game was released on July 6, 2016. Currently it is only available in the US, Australia, and New Zealand. Plans for release in Europe and Asia have been recently postponed, according to Independent.co.uk. This is confirmed by androidcentral.com. The reason for the delay? Server issues. From the get-go Pokémon Go has been plagued by server issues. Many players haven’t been able to log on and when they finally can get onto the game, they are met with server failure messages. Some can play for only small stretches of time. The game directs people to places where there are supposed to be Pokémon only to find out that exhausted servers can’t actually populate the monsters. This is chronicled in articles on kotaku.com, forbes.com, and polygon.com. What’s truly funny is that while Nintendo is reaping the benefits of the game in terms of rising stock prices, the company that actually built the game is only getting grief for the bugs. Niantic developed a game called Ingress that was released in December of 2013. If you play Pokémon Go and look at Ingress, you’ll notice they’re exactly the same game except Nintendo has allowed Niantic to use its very popular Pokémon monsters. In other words, Nintendo didn’t do a damn thing to develop this game. They paid Niantic to do it and now Nintendo gets all the accolades and Niantic gets ire of players. You can read more about the partnership at arstechnica.com, businessinsider.com, and nintendolife.com. Pokémon Go features a combination of a game and real world interaction and is known as "augmented reality" (AR) I have a hard time feeling a warm glow for Nintendo’s success. In 2014, the company posted its first loss in over 30 years. It’s not a company that is suffering, it’s a company that hasn’t done anything new since the Wii and that was not as wildly successful as they hoped. Since then, they haven’t innovated a great deal. Even this phone game is the result of someone else’s work. Apple (a company I despise) is also profiting mightily from this game. Despite the game being free, Pokémon Go is the most profitable app for both Android and iOS. Long story short, a lot of people are spending small amounts of money on the in-game purchases. People are extolling the positives of this game as though it will save mankind from itself. Att.com has declared that “Pokémon Go is Helping Players’ Mental Health.” Similar sentiments have been echoed at themarysue.com and Nintendolife.com. Sites like Destructoid and Reddit are posting about how Pokémon Go is leading to increased socializing and curbing social anxiety. Yahoo.com, ign.com, and even usatoday.com are all praising the game for getting people to exercise. Remember, this is a game that was released 5 days ago. Can we really declare it the curer of mental illness, social anxiety, and obesity in a mere 5 days!? No. Because people have already figured out that driving to get Pokémon is a lot less work, if slightly more dangerous. Jalopnik.com, nypost.com, and others are highlighting the dangers Pokémon Go poses while driving. It makes sense. You can’t text and drive, why the heck would you play a game and drive? And yet people are doing it. It’s become such a real problem that police are releasing PSAs. The Tennessee Highway Safety Office, Sarasota Police Department, and even Australia’s Northern Territory Police, Fire, and Emergency Services are all recent examples of authorities issuing warnings to the general public. Speaking of cops, they’ve had their hands full, too. As many of you probably know now a young woman in Wyoming was led by Pokémon Go to a river where she found a dead body. Granted, the body is merely coincidental, but still, she hopped two fences to get to the river which makes you wonder how responsible a game is that encourages trespassing. Additionally in the St. Louis area, a group of 4 young men were using Pokémon Go to find victims to rob at gunpoint. TMZ.com just posted about how people are encouraged to use the “buddy system” when playing Pokémon Go because the risk of getting robbed or beat up is that real. Not to mention all the standard dangers of walking with your nose in your phone and not paying attention to your surroundings. Police have been called to check out “suspicious persons” because it unnerves people to seen unfamiliar faces staring at the front of their house with a phone in their hand. Or, slowly trolling parks where children are playing. In general, people don’ t like other people who look like creepers and sorry, but slowly casing a neighborhood with phone in hand puts you in the creeper category. Additionally, people are zombie-walking into traffic, crowds, buildings, light posts, and in some cases sustaining injuries. Nypost.com, washingtonpost.com, today.com and others are running articles detailing the injuries of players. Most injuries are the garden variety skinned knees and hands, bumps on heads from walking into walls, and twisted ankles. Mommy bloggers are already galvanizing against this new threat to their offspring. It’s not just that players aren’t paying attention, however. Pokémon Go, like Ingress before it, situates gyms and pokestores in landmarked places like monuments, churches, graveyards. . . uh, and strip clubs. Gizmodo.com ran an article chronicling the many, many, many strip clubs that serve as Pokemon Go gyms and stops. Not just strip clubs but also gun shops, liquor stores, and adult toy shops. This leads me to believe that the game isn’t meant for children. I know that I haven’t seen anyone under the age of 25 playing the game. So if it’s meant for adults then it makes sense that strip clubs would be prominent. The map can lead people to dodgy parts of town, construction sites, abandoned buildings, and in the case one poor sap, his house. Boon Sheridan in Massachusetts purchased an old church and converted into his home. Unfortunately, the Ingress maps haven’t been updated since before 2015 so the map treats his home as a church and has declared it a Pokémon gym (in Ingress it was a small base) and he’s experienced an increase in foot traffic. I admit I’m a cynic and a curmudgeon. The hyperbole being heaped on this game by the 24-hour news media is driving me up a wall. It’s. A. Game. Some are going to go outside and experience new things. Others are going to pay their way to leveling up. More are going to hack the game. In all reality, this game will fade into the background the way Ingress did. Until then, it’s going to be an annoying part of life as everything from grocery shopping to simply taking a stroll becomes a gauntlet of zombie-walking Pokémon Go players. I will continue to laugh at the plethora of whacked-out news stories centered on this game. I will feel no sympathy for the poor schmucks who are spending money on upgrading their Pokémon because they have jobs that keep them from wandering the streets. I will laugh and internally mock every Pokémon Go player I see walk into a walk or put their life in danger to get a digital monster (not to be confused with Digimon, Pokémon’s competitor). I will roll my eyes at every conversation I hear centered on the drama, tension, and super high stakes of catching Pokémon. Gleefully, I will absorb stories of betrayal and back stabbing. And I will laugh and laugh and laugh.