footsteps
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29 posts in this topic

me,myself and I

 

I was adopted at birth,my real mother 15 my father 16 which was'nt too cool in 1964 .My adoptive parents were the only parents I had known my whole life.until age 32.my adoptive parents had both passed away at this time. A man comes to my door and says he's my uncle and here is the number to call him ? I call and he tells me that my real mother had been looking for me for years,and was afraid to call,but if I want to call here's the number.So I call and oh boy what an emotional rollercoaster ride.I fly to Texas to meet my mom and brother and sister(full blood)and what seemed like hundreds of relatives,it was so overwhelming.I'm so glad I had my wife was there for support.I felt whole,all the guessing of who my mom was is over! So now I wanted to meet my father, my sister pointed me in the right direction,and had to trick him to meet him.I just showed up at his door. He tells me that I was not his son NOT HIS SON? I knew from the moment I saw him that he was my father!I did'nt think he would be my best friend.I just wanted him to acknowledge me as his son but no.I'm telling you this because today my father had shot himself in the head,commited suicide.The ultimate goodbye.I will never be able to try to mend that fence.I always hoped that someday he would call me just to say Hi son,how are you doing.

 

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Uhhh. Wow. I'm speechless.

 

I wasn't expecting it to end like that when I read the beginning.

 

I'm just going to mention the positive,

That's so awesome that you had that feeling of being 'whole', and wow... You have a sister? That must feel SO crazy, right? :o

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I am indeed sorry for your loss, but perhaps you could take comfort in the fact that you did manage to meet some of your biological family at all, and it seems, made some heartfelt connections along the way. Some adopted children do not even get that chance, as their biological parents are never known to them.

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I am indeed sorry for your loss, but perhaps you could take comfort in the fact that you did manage to meet some of your biological family at all, and it seems, made some heartfelt connections along the way. Some adopted children do not even get that chance, as their biological parents are never known to them.

 

Your absolutely right! I do have that.Welcome to the boards :applause:

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Thats so sad oakman :(

I too wasn't expecting that ending. Joy and pain together.

May healing flow to your heart and peace to your mind, and may you and your mom become good friends.

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As you know from my last journal post I was not very close to my father as I've only officially spoke to him for maybe an hour or more my whole life,which was his choice by the way.I then attended his funeral where I met with people that has known my father, friends,co-workers , family and Kay my fathers girlfriend at the time.I felt like an outcast ,a ghost,someone that people could'nt look at straight in the face.I would stop to listen to certain people talking and pointing at me like I was'nt even there.Oh! thats him,right over there.!My own family made me feel like an outcast,they failed to mention to me that they were all going to be wearing Hawaiian shirts and jeans in honor of my father.I was wearing formal black. I would have worn a Hawaiian shirt if asked. My only consolation to this bizarre day I would introduce myself as "Jacks first born son"which raised a few eyebrows.I just want to be in my rightful place in this family and not be the one that is in the dark hidden away from family affairs.After all I am the first born son!

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Wow Man, I can't believe this tragedy happened almost seven years ago.

Well kind of an update. My wife and I adopted two boys of our own, and man they are great kids.

Too bad someone would rather take drugs than to have these two boys in their lives, but their loss is our gain.

Two years into the adoption, and my boys are 3 & 7

They are totally into superheroes, and ninja turtles.:headbang:

 

 

 

 

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It seems you went from one side of the story, to the other.

What you're doing for those boys is incredible, teach them well, and they may do the same in years to come.

 

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5 minutes ago, Hado said:

It seems you went from one side of the story, to the other.

What you're doing for those boys is incredible, teach them well, and they may do the same in years to come.

 

Thank you, it's been a blast.

Here's my reluctant 3 year old Steven sitting next to me .

 

IMG_20170326_103036.jpg

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Hey Oak,

Thought I'd chime in here. I am also adopted and although I have never met my birth parents, I have never had the desire to do so. I always felt like they would ask me for money or something haha. I would really like to meet my siblings however. But the way I look at is like I won the lottery because I got to have parents that desperately wanted me as opposed to people who desperately did not. I commend you for adopting children of your own and one day they will feel the same, that they are lucky you and your wife came along and gave them a wonderful life.:golfclap:

JF 

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