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The Black Room (2017)

Natasha Henstridge, Lukas Hassel, Dominique Swain, Lin Shaye 

Directed by: Rolfe Kanefsky (a lot of B movies)

Platform: Netflix 

IMDB: 3.3/10, RT: N/A

Synopsis: Demon in the basement via a secret door, new couple moves in blah blah blah.

Verdict: I can’t believe Lin Shaye was in this is. Truly awful. Acting is passable but the intro (credits) was laughable, the music even worse! Just an excuse for gratuitous sex and nudity, judging by the directors credits this is his forte.

Black Rain (1989)

Michael Douglas, Andy Garcia, Ken Takakura, Kate Capshaw

Directed by: Ridley Scott

Platform: NowTV 

IMDB: 6.6/10, RT: 52% Rotten

Synopsis: Douglas plays hard boiled unconventional cop (was there any other type in the 80s?), he busts a Japanese criminal who is promptly deported to Tokyo accompanied by Douglas and Garcia, they are duped by his men posing as police officers. Refusing to go back they strike a partnership with Tokyo Detective Takakura whose styles clash.

Verdict: This was a return to form for Scott who had suffered a few box office duds (yes Blade Runner was a flop!), it looks great and Tokyo really comes to life at night oddly looking like Blade Runner in places. As for the film, it’s ok, it’s overly long for the story it’s telling which has been done before and has all the usual tropes, there is not nearly enough action over the two hours that I feel is required for a film like this. I wouldn’t have pegged Douglas for this type of role but he does fine along with the rest of the cast.

Black Death (2010)

Eddie Redmayne, Sean Bean, Carice Van Houten, Kimberley Nixon

Directed by: Christopher Smith (Creep, Triangle)

Platform: Recorded from TV (Horror channel)

IMDB: 6.4/10, RT: 71% Fresh

Ned Stark & Melisandre together in a movie!

Synopsis: Redmayne plays a young monk in England in 1348, the country is in the throes of the first outbreak of bubonic plague. Bean plays a Knight and envoy of the Bishop who has been sent to investigate a village where the disease has not appeared, with rumours abound that the village is headed by a Necromancer, Redmayne becomes a guide to the party as they head deep into the marshlands.

Verdict: I wasn’t a fan of the handheld camera work and the production values that feels a bit like a 90s TV series (think Xena, Hercules), although you do get used to it. The film however is sluggish in its story telling and put my limits of patience to the test, not a lot really happens.

Black Butterfly (2017)

Antonio Banderas, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Piper Perabo

Directed by: Brian Goodman (actor who has been in a lot of things, this is his 2nd movie)

Platform: NowTV 

IMDB: 6.1/10, RT: 42% Rotten

Synopsis: Banderas plays a writer whose wife has left him, he spends most of his time drinking and is looking to sell his house in the sticks as he can no longer afford to keep it going. After meeting with his realtor Perabo he picks up hitchhiker Meyers on the side of the road, Banderas offers him a place to stay in exchange he will help with DIY needed in the house. Meyers tries to help Banderas to start writing again and in doing so Banderas begins to suspect his guest is not the full ticket.

Verdict: Elements of Misery but without the tension and crazy Kathy Bates, but it’s a passable thriller, I didn’t mind it. Bit of a twist ending which I didn’t see coming but still nothing that special.

Note: Turn the volume up, Banderas spends most the time whispering!

Birth of the Dragon (2016)

Phillip Ng, Yu Xia, Billy Magnussen

Directed by: George Nolfi (The Adjustment Bureau)

Platform: NowTV

IMDB: 5.4/10, RT: 24% Rotten

Synopsis: The film is inspired by the real life fight that happened between Bruce Lee and Shaolin master Wong Jack Man, Shaolin disagreed with Lee teaching non Chinese Wing Chun Kung-Fu. 

Verdict: I learned Wing Chun in my early 20s for a while, it was nice to see some of the techniques in the teaching segments of the movie.

If you are wanting to watch this film thinking it’s all about Bruce Lee, it isn’t, the story focuses more on the American character played by Magnussen, this was the main issue with test screenings so reshoot were done to focus more on Lee and Wong and that’s why the movie feels shoddily put together. The fight scenes are ok but the “Ip Man” movies with Donnie Yen are far better. Unfortunately this movie doesn’t know what it wants to be or be about, better off watching “Dragon The Bruce Lee Story”.

Note: The Movie is produced by WWE studios which explains a lot now!

Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) (2014)

Michael Keaton, Zach Galifianakis, Edward Norton, Andrea Riseborough, Emma Stone

Directed by: Alejandro G. innaritu (21 Grams, Babel, The Revenant)

Platform: Netflix 

IMDB: 7.7/10, RT: 91% Fresh

Synopsis: Keaton plays a washed up actor who is only remembered for playing a hugely successful superhero in a franchise of movies, his fresh out of rehab daughter is his assistant as he prepares for opening night on a play he wrote, directed and is acting in.

Verdict: I was utterly enthralled with this movie, the acting, the amazing tracking shots and seemingly everything looking like one take. Recommended!

Bird Box (2018) - based on the novel of the same name by Josh Malerman

Sandra Bullock, Trevante Rhodes, John Malkovich, Sarah Paulson

Directed by: Susanne Bier (The Night Manager)

Platform: Netflix - a Netflix Original Movie

IMDB: 6.6/10, RT: 63% Fresh

Synopsis: Bullock plays a pregnant artist who along with her sister finds out an abnormal event is occurring across the globe, people are committing mass suicide for no reason. It appears if you look outside something clouds your eyes, you see something and it compels you to commit suicide. Bullock finds herself holed up in a house with other strangers, it’s told over two time periods, when it first happens and 5 years in the future.

Verdict: It starts off ok, I like the cast but the story is just too reminiscent of the pointless “The Happening” and the recent “A Quiet Place” which I didn’t particularly like either. Bird Box is supposed to be a tension filled thriller but I found neither, a lot of times I was bored to be honest.

Billy Madison (1995)

Adam Sandler, Darren McGavin, Bridgette Wilson-Sampras, Bradley Whitford

Directed by: Tamra Davis (music videos and TV shows)

Platform: Netflix

IMDB: 6.4/10, RT: 40% Rotten

Synopsis: In order to inherit his fed up father's hotel empire, an immature and lazy man must repeat grades 1-12 all over again.

Verdict: Yay another Sandler movie. Adam Sandler plays Adam Sandler, only son of a rich tycoon who spends his time doing nothing, yada yada yada, I turned it off. I can’t believe how bad 90s comedies were!

Big Driver (2014) - based on the novella of the same name from the book “Full Dark, No Stars” by Stephen King

Maria Bello, Ann Dowd, Will Harris, Joan Jett, Olympia Dukakis

Directed by: Mikael Salomon (quite a few TV shows)

Platform: recorded from TV

IMDB: 5.6/10, RT: 50% Rotten

Synopsis: Bello plays famous mystery writer (who can see ghosts) suffers a flat tyre in the middle of nowhere, a seemingly friendly large man lends a hand until he’s not so friendly and he beats and rapes her, leaving her for dead in a large sewer pipe, there she find the remains of his other victims.

Verdict: Yeah I gave it 20 mins and the TV movie acting and production values caused me to turn it off.

Big Daddy (1999)

Adam Sandler, Joey Lauren Adams, Jon Stewart, Leslie Mann

Directed by: Dennis Dugan (Happy Gilmore, Beverly Hills Ninja, Grown Ups)

Platform: Netflix

IMDB: 6.4/10, RT: 40% Rotten

Synopsis: A lazy law school grad adopts a kid to impress his girlfriend, but everything doesn't go as planned and he becomes the unlikely foster father.

Verdict: Adam Sandler plays Adam Sandler until a kid is dumped on him, Yada yada yada I turned it off.

The Beyond (2017)

Jane Perry, Nigel Barber, Noeleen Comiskey 

Directed by: Hasraff Dulull (2036 Origin Unknown) - saw this recently, review in this thread, it’s bad!

Platform: Netflix 

IMDB: 4.8/10

Synopsis: Filmed like a documentary, it charts the international space community as they look into an anomaly that has appeared in space (like Interstellar).

Verdict: And that’s as far as I got as it’s as dull as dishwater!

Beyond Suspicion (2018) original title was “Bent”

Karl Urban, Andy Garcia, Sofia Vergara

Directed by: Bobby Moresco

Platform: NowTV 

IMDB: 5.4/10

Synopsis: On his latest private investigation, a shamed former cop connects a murder case to a government conspiracy involving rogue agents from a top spy agency.

Verdict: Not even Sofia Vergara could stop me from turning off this slow run of the mill action thriller.

Beyond Skyline (2017)

Frank Grillo, Bojana Novokovic, Jonny Weston, Callan Mulvey, Iko Uwais and Antonio Fargas 

Directed by: Liam O'Donnell

2 members of the Shield Strike Team (Grillo, Mulvey) in the movie!

Platform: Netflix 

IMDB: 5.3/10, RT: 67% Fresh

Synopsis: Grillo plays a detective who does all he can to rescue his son who has been sucked up into one of the alien ships.

Verdict: Sequel to the 2010 movie which takes place at the same time, you see some events from the first but from a different perspective, characters from the first movie also make a brief return but they are replaced by different actors. Entertaining enough for what it is, it’s pretty action packed until the 3rd act where it comes to a halt so a lot of story can be explained and it did lose me here but it picks up again.

Between Worlds (2018)

Nicholas Cage, Franka Potente, Penelope Mitchell

Directed by: Maria Pulera

Platform: Netflix 

IMDB: 4.9/10, RT: 32% Rotten

Synopsis: Joe meets a mother who can contact spirits when suffocating. Her daughter is dying when Joe helps the mother spiritually contact the daughter and save her. Unfortunately, the spirit in the daughter's body is now that of Joe's dead wife.

Verdict: Another Nic Cage pension top up!

Better Watch Out (2016)

Olivia DeJonge, Levi Miller, Ed Oxenbould, Aleks Mikic with Patrick Warburton & Virginia Madsen

Directed by: Chris Peckover

Platform: NowTV

IMDB: 6.5/10, RT: 88% Fresh

Synopsis: DeJonge is a baby sitter finishing school and looking forward to heading off to college, she looks after 12 year old Miller as she always does however with a broken window, a pizza they didn’t order and slashed tyres this isn’t going to be a normal evening!

Verdict: I really enjoyed this and after watching “The Babysitter” it had a lot to live up to, I think it’s a film that doesn’t take itself too seriously and it’s got a twist in it which makes this type of film refreshing and it was an ask to have this film lead by such a young cast but they pull it off. I won’t post the trailer as I think it gives too much away, this is a movie you need to go in knowing very little. 

There is a mid credits scene.

Berlin Syndrome (2017) - based on the novel of the same name by Melanie Joosten

Teresa Palmer, Max Riemelt

Directed by: Cate Shortland (Smilf)

Platform: Netflix 

IMDB: 6.3/10, RT: 74% Fresh

Synopsis: Australian traveller Palmer is back packing through Europe and is currently in Berlin, she meets German Riemelt and they have a one night stand, when she attempts to leave in the morning she finds herself trapped. Riemelt returns claiming an honest mistake and hands her a key telling her she can leave now, trusting him they go out clubbing instead but it begins to slowly dawn on her that she is being imprisoned.

Verdict: A slow psychological drama, normally a thriller but there is less of that than you would expect, it’s more character driven and while I watched to the end I think I probably would have turned it off if not for the excellent performance from Palmer who totally commits to the role.

Benny & Joon (1993)

Johnny Depp, Mary Stuart Masterson, Aidan Quinn & Julianne Moore

Directed by: Jeremiah S Chechik (Christmas Vacation, The Avengers (UK))

Platform: Netflix 

IMDB: 7.2/10, RT: 71% Fresh

Synopsis: Quinn is the overprotective brother of mentally ill Masterson, he puts his life on hold to care for her, he then takes in a friends cousin (Depp) who talks little, comes across as eccentric and acts out scenes from movies by Buster Keaton and Charlie Chaplin. He interrupts their lives in a fashion they don’t anticipate.

Verdict: Fun and touching romantic drama with great performances by all especially Depp that earned him a Golden Globe nomination.

The Belko Experiment (2016)

John Gallagher Jr, Tony Goldwyn, Adria Arjona, John C McGinley, Melonie Diaz, Sean Gunn & Michael Rooker

Directed by: Greg McClean (Wolf Creek), written by James Gunn

Platform: Netflix

IMDB: 6.1/10, RT: 52% Rotten

Synopsis: Employees of Belko Corporation arrive for another day of work in Bogotá, Colombia, everything seems normal except Gallagher notices the guards are different and that all Colombian nationals have been sent home. The day proceeds until an unknown voice proclaims over the tannoy that 3 people must die immediately otherwise they will kill 6, the building then has shutters closed on all windows and doors making the building a prison. 

Verdict: Elements of Lord of the Flies and Battle Royale but inside an office building, it plays out in typical fashion not offering anything new which is disappointing considering it was written by Gunn. There is more blood in this then there was in Cabin in the Woods!

The Believers (1987) - based on the novel “The Religion” by Nicholas Conde

Martin Sheen, Helen Shaver, Robert Loggia, Jimmy Smits

Directed by: John Schlesinger (Midnight Cowboy, Marathon Man, Pacific Heights)

Platform: Netflix

IMDB: 6.1/10, RT: 31% Rotten

Synopsis: Sheen plays a psychologist whose wife suffers an accident and she passes away, fast forward and Sheen is piecing his life back together with his son, he gets pulled into a police case where undercover officer Smits has a psychotic break after investigating ritualistic killings of children, Loggia his supervisor takes over the case and enlists Sheens help.

Verdict: I watched for 40 minutes and it really didn’t hold my interest.

Beneath Us (2019) - English & Spanish language with English subtitles 

Lynn Collins, Rigo Sanchez, Josue Aguirre

Directed by: Max Pachman (nothing of note)

Platform: NowTV 

IMDB: 6.7/10

Synopsis: Wealthy Collins hires 4 illegal workers to work on her summer house, they all thinks it’s an easy $500 each until they realise she’s not the full ticket.

Verdict: Slowburn thriller, when you reach the point of understanding what the real story is you’re beyond caring.

Beauty and the Beast (La belle et la bete) (2016) - French language with English subtitles 

Lea Seydoux, Vincent Cassel, Andre Dussollier

Directed by: Christophe Gans (Brotherhood of the Wolf, Silent Hill)

Platform: NowTV

IMDB: 6.4/10, RT: 33% Rotten

Synopsis: An unexpected romance blooms after the the youngest daughter of a merchant who has fallen on hard times offers herself to the mysterious beast to which her father has become indebted.

Verdict: Live action lavish production of the old French story, thankfully not a musical! It looks fantastic although some of the CGI looks a little hokey. It starts off well and held my interest but my problem with it is I was just bored halfway through and couldn’t be bothered to continue. Lea Seydoux though 

The Beast Within (1982)

Ronny Cox, Bibi Besch, Paul Clemens

Directed by: Philippe Mora (The Howling 2 & 3, Communion)

Platform: Netflix UK

IMDB: 5.5/10, RT: 11% Rotten

Synopsis: Married couple Cox and Besch breakdown at the side of the road, the dog goes running off into the forest and the wife follows, something kills the dog and knocks the wife unconscious, a beast than rapes her. Fast forward 17 years and their son is in hospital suffering from some unknown ailment, Cox starts to investigate what may have attacked his wife in the hope of saving his son.

Verdict: Boring horror with a decent transformation scene, the acting is DTV quality and the music runs from bad to terrible. 

Optimus Prime narrates the trailer.

Baywatch (2017)

Dwayne Johnson, Zac Efron, Alexandra Daddario, Priyanka Chopra

Directed by: Seth Gordon (Horrible Bosses, Identity Thief)

Platform: Netflix UK

IMDB: 5.6/10, RT: 18% Rotten

Synopsis: Devoted lifeguard Mitch Buchannon butts heads with a brash new recruit, as they uncover a criminal plot that threatens the future of the bay.

Verdict: The Rock, biggest movie star on the planet, yet has made some right stinkers. Yawn!