Advice for 10y.o. sci-fi/comic geek son (in Oklahoma)?

[Smokinghawk]

My older boy is a total sci-fi geek. Doctor Who, Star Trek, Star Wars, Harry Potter--you name it. He has T-shirts with Daleks and Tardises (Tardi?) on them, and has gone through 5 "sonic screwdriver" toys because he plays with them so much.

 

The problem is that he's living in a community where sports is king, and he's not athletic. He's hyperactive and into stuff the other kids think is lame. He gets called awful names in school by kids who think he's stupid and weird because of his interests.

 

Rather than trying to force him into "cool kid" pretense, we'd actually just rather double-down and loyally support his choice to be a comic book/sci-fi geek. The problem is that we don't a single other 10-year-old kid in Oklahoma City who likes the same things! We've gone so far as to put up a flier in the comic store seeking other kids with similar interests who might want to hang out with him too (they could meet at the comic store).

 

Does anyone have ANY ideas we haven;t thought of for helping him through this? Or finding other geeks like us, who are around his age?

 

Thanks!

 

[Shootydog]

http://www.gameheadquarters.com/

 

The store is located at 89th and Penn south of I240. It caters to gamers and sci fi geeks of all kinds.

 

Check out their newsletter "The Dispatch". At any one time they have games, miniatures, D&D, Magic, and everything else gamer related going on in store and chaperoned. The owners name is Ron Palmatary and hes a great guy.

 

I spent a good many of my years in that store and it is the best place in OKC to meet other like minded people. I guarantee you your son will meet others like him in which to form friendships and be himself.

 

I surely did.

[nwpassage]

Life can be ridiculously hard, and adolescence is the worst. From a geek who escaped the torment of not fitting into the mold by taking a 20 year slide into drug addiction, I applaud your decision to stand beside him. I love my parents, but they had no idea what they could do to save me, and practiced the head in the sand approach. I'm sure with your support he'll find himself. Peace.

[telerites]

Nice to see another OKC forumite.

 

New World Comics used to have a kids club - they sill may - I haven't been there in years.

 

 

[Logan510]

Serious advice: Enroll him in Karate or some other form of martial arts asap. Kids are rotten to each other and it's not going to get any easier once he becomes a teenager. The ability to defend himself will come in very handy plus it's good for building self esteem etc etc.

[Scrooge]

I am sure you tried but wouldn't there be some reading groups at your local public library? I know that's where I found other like minded people back in the days.

 

Also, would your son be interested in scouting?

[Shootydog]

Nice to see another OKC forumite.

 

New World Comics used to have a kids club - they sill may - I haven't been there in years.

 

 

New World on SW. 44th used to me my old haunt and I ran many a D&D game back in the day there. Must be 20 years now. New World on Meridian I don't think really caters to that anymore and frankly I don't think its run very well. The place is a mess.

 

The best comic store in OKC that I know of is All Star Comics on May but they don't have any gaming/sci fi meetings that I know of. Just pure comics and a very knowledgeable store owner.

 

Most of the stores have come and gone but Ron has been at that location for years. It is simply the best source of geekness in this city. Ill even be glad to meet you there (schedule permitting) and introduce around. When my daughter is old enough I will be exposing her to the life....wife notwithstanding of course.

 

Its not a comic shop, its a gaming store...but the geek is strong with this one.

[seanfingh]

Serious advice: Enroll him in Karate or some other form of martial arts asap. Kids are rotten to each other and it's not going to get any easier once he becomes a teenager. The ability to defend himself will come in very handy plus it's good for building self esteem etc etc.

 

I don't have any kids, so take this for what it is worth, but +1.

 

Martial arts builds discipline and will allow him to get more coordinated, flexible, healthy etc, since he is not athletically inclined. The self-defense aspect is a distant third to increased self esteem and some good physical activity.

[Scrooge]

New World on Meridian turned into a worse pit than it was before when a younger set took over management. Used to be able to find some older books there but no longer. New World on SW 44th is too much gaming for my tastes for a comic book store.

 

I'll have to agree that All Star is the best shop now for collectors like us but I don't see that any would help out SmokingHawk's son.

 

Stores in Norman are the same: both are ok for new stuff, none for old stuff and neither are good for outlet for kids.

[telerites]

That's a shame about New World. Like I said I haven't been to a LCS in years. I don't buy new comics and my son never got into them. I know All-Star is run by the previous owner of New World.

 

I do want to comment on the karate opinion. My son was not the most athletic of sorts either. We tried karate, basketball, t-ball, baseball, track, etc. None of these were a fit for my son. I'm not saying don't give it a try but I like your approach of accepting him for his likes. I admit trying to impose a variety of sports as I am athletically inclined but never pushed too hard especially when I saw he wasn't cut out to be an athlete and didn't really enjoy it.

 

I even coached the little league teams. After a few years of seeing how some parents try to live vicariously through their kids and are just brutal in their criticism of kids (theirs and others). I thought life is too short for this. Let my kid be what he wants to be.

 

My son did like acting - we discovered a child's acting group in OKC that is run by a very nice lady. Included a handful of kids and wasn't intimidating. My boy hasn't continued it (he is 14 now) but did seem to the one thing that seemed to fit for him.

 

Good luck!

 

 

[ashrael]

Serious advice: Enroll him in Karate or some other form of martial arts asap. Kids are rotten to each other and it's not going to get any easier once he becomes a teenager. The ability to defend himself will come in very handy plus it's good for building self esteem etc etc.

 

I agree. I wasn't really big into sports in middle and high school, and felt a bit of an outsider at times, and tang soo do (a Korean style of martial art like tae kwon do) was great. I never needed to defend myself, but it was great for self esteem and meeting lots of cool other people.

 

(Then again, don't force him to take the classes...I chose it and probably wouldn't have been interested if I hadn't seen a demonstration by other kids.)

[ashrael]

I am sure you tried but wouldn't there be some reading groups at your local public library? I know that's where I found other like minded people back in the days.

 

Also, would your son be interested in scouting?

 

I also second this...I was at a boy scout meeting when I saw the martial arts demonstration! :thumbsup:

[gozer]

This may not help him meet other like-minded kids, but a thought on focusing

his energies - present him with a lot of hands-on opportunities for things

other than the internet.

 

Build a SW radio with him and figure out the radio spectrum, become a ham radio

operator, find out all the common spiders in OK and set out to catch an

example of each one (show him high-magnification photos of jumping spiders --

they're very cool), re-create the experiments that Bill Nye does, build a trebuchet

in your back yard, try radio-controlled model aircraft or model rocketry.

 

As far as sci-fi books, how about Heinlein's juveniles (e.g., Starman Jones)?

[Not*Sure*]

I agree about the karate..it took me getting my butt kicked (with a skull fracture and concussion) to make my mom think that was a good idea..

 

and I am a girl..

 

BTW he is ADORABLE..

 

 

Tell him not to take much stock in the teasing..the other kids are insecure because he is smarter than all of them put together..their anger comes from the fact that when he is enjoying gaming and collecting his comics in his mansion..they will be the ones taking his order at Burger King..

 

Most of all he should be himself..FTW and what they think..only people who are special enough to see how special he is are good enough to hang out with him anyway.

 

It is a shame the outside world punsihes true individuals who think outside the herd mentality..

 

Man is that kid CUTE..I mean Handsome..tell him I said handsome..my grandsons hate it when I say "cute"

 

wouldn't know about boyscouts..girl scouts are biotchs.. (They were just jealous because I sold more cookies)..maybe boy Scouts are cooler..

 

[FlyingDonut]

Serious advice: Enroll him in Karate or some other form of martial arts asap. Kids are rotten to each other and it's not going to get any easier once he becomes a teenager. The ability to defend himself will come in very handy plus it's good for building self esteem etc etc.

 

I don't have any kids, so take this for what it is worth, but +1.

 

Martial arts builds discipline and will allow him to get more coordinated, flexible, healthy etc, since he is not athletically inclined. The self-defense aspect is a distant third to increased self esteem and some good physical activity.

 

+2. Is Stronguy here - he's a big martial arts expert...

 

Both of my children are high-level black belts in taekwondo. They both needed a place to go after school, so we sent them there. My son started at 6, and my daughter started at 5. They still go, nine years and five years later.

 

They both have had excellent experiences, and it has built self-esteem and confidence in both of them, as well as providing discipline and focus. Its also something that you can do with him.

 

My son was a bit of a "geek" at the time - he is NOT into sports at all, is left-handed, is an artist, etc. etc. etc. - you name the stereotype, he was it - and taekwondo was a place where he could go and just be a kid. It didn't hurt that he got really good at it. I'm not pushing taekwondo, but something like it was a big plus for both of my kids.

[mrmitchgro]

Serious advice: Enroll him in Karate or some other form of martial arts asap. Kids are rotten to each other and it's not going to get any easier once he becomes a teenager. The ability to defend himself will come in very handy plus it's good for building self esteem etc etc.

 

I don't have any kids, so take this for what it is worth, but +1.

 

Martial arts builds discipline and will allow him to get more coordinated, flexible, healthy etc, since he is not athletically inclined. The self-defense aspect is a distant third to increased self esteem and some good physical activity.

 

+2. Is Stronguy here - he's a big martial arts expert...

 

Both of my children are high-level black belts in taekwondo. They both needed a place to go after school, so we sent them there. My son started at 6, and my daughter started at 5. They still go, nine years and five years later.

 

They both have had excellent experiences, and it has built self-esteem and confidence in both of them, as well as providing discipline and focus. Its also something that you can do with him.

 

My son was a bit of a "geek" at the time - he is NOT into sports at all, is left-handed, is an artist, etc. etc. etc. - you name the stereotype, he was it - and taekwondo was a place where he could go and just be a kid. It didn't hurt that he got really good at it. I'm not pushing taekwondo, but something like it was a big plus for both of my kids.

 

It would also help with the hyperactivity you mentioned. I was always full of energy when I was a kid too, and kung fu classes really helped me channel that!

 

[faster friends]

Buy him a guitar

[the blob]

My older boy is a total sci-fi geek. Doctor Who, Star Trek, Star Wars, Harry Potter--you name it. He has T-shirts with Daleks and Tardises (Tardi?) on them, and has gone through 5 "sonic screwdriver" toys because he plays with them so much.

 

The problem is that he's living in a community where sports is king, and he's not athletic. He's hyperactive and into stuff the other kids think is lame. He gets called awful names in school by kids who think he's stupid and weird because of his interests.

 

Rather than trying to force him into "cool kid" pretense, we'd actually just rather double-down and loyally support his choice to be a comic book/sci-fi geek. The problem is that we don't a single other 10-year-old kid in Oklahoma City who likes the same things! We've gone so far as to put up a flier in the comic store seeking other kids with similar interests who might want to hang out with him too (they could meet at the comic store).

 

Does anyone have ANY ideas we haven;t thought of for helping him through this? Or finding other geeks like us, who are around his age?

 

Thanks!

 

 

Funny thing is, practically all of my son's [male] contemporaries (age 5-7 or so) here in NYC are at least casually into this stuff in one form or another. if they don't like comic characters (and most do even if they don't read comics), they're into star wars or harry potter. maybe not dr. who though (though I'm sure my son would like that as he digs anything with robots and what not, he just might not get it).

 

So, you can move to NYC or San Fransico I guess.....

 

What about a convention when one hits town or nearby? Okl. City and Tulsa must get some comic and sci fi conventions. and then harass every other 10 year old there!

 

Maybe there's a sport out there he can enjoy? Not to force something on a kid, but these are good things to have with you as an adult for social purposes and plenty of sports do not require atheltic ability. I sure as heck play more tennis and golf with my colleagues/friends than sports like football, which are a knee injury waiting to happen. Fencing would go along with the star wars theme. (seriously, a friend of mine (who was more of an artist/musiian...NEVER played any sports whatsoever) took up fencing at like 14 and was trying out for the olympics eventually (he didn't make the cut, of course), but he transformed himself into a really good fencer in a couple of years. And the thing is, if he has ANY aptitude and desire he could very well become one of the best 10 year old fencers in all of Oklahoma. and who would mess with him if he's walking around with a foil?

[the blob]

oh yeah, ditto on the karate. if he likes this stuff, wants to be a jedi, martial arts are a natural thing and there will be kids there.

[MedicAR]

Serious advice: Enroll him in Karate or some other form of martial arts asap. Kids are rotten to each other and it's not going to get any easier once he becomes a teenager. The ability to defend himself will come in very handy plus it's good for building self esteem etc etc.

 

This may not be a bad idea. The martial arts may have quite literallysaved a friend mine's life. He was far too intelligent for our small hometown, to the point that he drove teachers crazy wanting more and more information. He eventually realized there was nothing for him in high school and went the drug/alcohol route. I have no idea why he became interested in the martial arts, but it gave him self confidence, helped him build his body, gave him discipline and taught him to kick serious butt!

 

Long story short, he became a rocket scientist. Literally. Makes more money than God now.

 

I just hid my geekness, no t-shirts and only the most obscure pins and such (who wore a Watchmen smiley in 1989?). My friends knew all about it, but the majority of the kids at school had no idea.