Does your significant other know how much you spend on your CGC hobby?

[J. Morrow]

If you buy CGC books, do you tell your partner how much you actually spend?

 

My partner and I have been together for eight years. Financially, we have a joint checking account, but each of us have separate checking, savings and credit cards as well. No kids (unless you consider our pups) and good incomes, so we do have disposable income and can spend money on some pretty frivolous things. We both spend money on lots of concert tickets. He has to have the newest Apple products as soon as they are released. And lately, I like building my CGC collection. Me obtaining CGC issues is not the concern. He has seen me on my IPad waiting for an auction to end, seen me mail comics off to the CGC for grading, and seen various boxes being delivered to me with a comic inside. Anything I have purchased is from my own money and never any joint funds. However, I realize that I don't always want to share what I spend on certain comics. Which makes me wonder - Does anyone else out there try to hide any of their CGC spending from their significant other?

 

I am not sure if its the dollar amount of an issue or what that makes me want to keep certain purchases to myself. My first CGC comic was an issue of Giant Size X-Men 1 that was an 8.5 grade and I purchased for $375 back in 2010. This was a comic I had always wanted and bought it for myself as a Birthday present. My partner knew all about it and was happy that I got it - though he could not believe someone would actually pay that much for a comic book. Within the last year, I have become more obsessed with collecting certain issues that I always wanted when I was younger, but could never afford on a $10/week allowance. My partner sees boxes being delivered to me and I normally share what I comic I got and why I wanted it - and he never asks me "How much was it?" So from a high level, he knows what I am doing. However, there have been a couple that I have hidden from his view.

 

For example - a few months ago, a relative of mine passed away and I found myself with some extra money that I was not expecting. Most of the money is going towards a vacation and a new couch. But, I also decided to plop down some of this money and buy myself a comic that I never thought I would ever own - a Fantastic Four 1. Yes, it was a large purchase, Yes it was signed by Stan Lee, but in my defense it was only a 3.5. I have had this issue for a few months now and it has sat inside a box and I have not shown it to anybody. He may not know a lot about comics, but he does know that a Fantastic Four #1 costs a little more than what he has seen me spend on other comics. At some point in time, I will end up putting it in my display case and just wait till he notices it. When he does, I will probably say something like "oh that...I have had that for awhile now."

 

So curious - Have you ever spent money on this hobby of ours and kept it to yourself?

 

See more journals by Jmorrow

[bagofleas]

Fortunately, I haven't had a significant other for 15 years now, and don't have any kids, so I have no need to be accountable or explain myself to anyone about how and where I spend my money.

 

Luckily, my parents raised me right, so I always make sure my bills are paid first, and never spend money I cannot afford to.

 

....... yes, I said "Fortunately".

[oakman29]

My balls are just fine where they are,set where they belong.Not only do I tell her how much I spend,she doesn't give me any kind of grief about it.

[newshane]

J. Morrow:

 

I'm in the same situation. My fiance never asks me how much I'm spending on my hobby. If she did ask, then I would tell her.

 

She does, however, have a decent idea about the cost of an average slab. After all, she's purchased a few for me as gifts. I'm very fortunate to have someone who encourages my hobbies.

 

About a year ago, my "grail" issue came up for sale. It was a four-figure purchase - the price of a decent used car. She was aware of the cost. In fact, when I tried talking myself out of it, she was there pushing me to do it because she knew how much it meant to me.

 

Is she aware that I've spent TENS of thousands on graded comics? Well...no. I hope she never sits down and does the math.

 

But I think the important thing is this:

 

1. We have our separate accounts and a joint account, which is strictly for costs related to the upcoming wedding. I think separate accounts work best for us because we can spend money without having to account to each other for every last dime. It also eliminates the power struggle that will inevitably arise when everything is shared. We pay our monthly bills as soon as we get paid. As long as all the needs are taken care of first (including retirement savings), then who really cares what our partner does with expendable money? In fact, I want my future wife to enjoy that freedom.

 

2. I will underscore the fact that BILLS MUST BE PAID FIRST. Otherwise, you definitely have a reason to be angry about the spending.

 

3. I think the most concerning thing here is that you are hiding something from your partner. Ask yourself why.

 

4. Yet again, you could tell yourself...hmmmm...the money IS mine because it came from MY relative. I assume that since you have separate accounts then there is still such a thing as "your money" and "his money." If this is true, then ask yourself the following: "Why do I feel like I have to tell him what I do with my money?"

 

5. I haven't told my fiance about every single purchase, but she did know when I made a mega purchase. I told her because I was excited to share it with her! I was pumped up at the chance. In the end, she decided that the money was well worth it because it brought me so much joy. I'm very lucky...but my point is this: I told my partner because I was excited about it! I didn't feel the need to "report" my spending. I also didn't feel scared to tell her what I was doing with MY money (not ours...and bills were paid).

 

I just don't feel the need to account for my "play" money as long as every responsibility and all needs are taken care of first. If my fiance stayed on my case about buying slabs with my extra cash, then I'd take back the ring and buy another grail.

[AnhDepTrai]

I don't ask her about how much she spent on her shoes/clothes, she better not asking how much I spent on my comic books!!!!!!!

[Lost]

I try and tell everyone how much. It gets it off my chest so I don't feel so guilty.

[DR.X]

My balls are just fine where they are,set where they belong.Not only do I tell her how much I spend,she doesn't give me any kind of grief about it.

 

+1

 

MIne could care less.............she's crazy about me.

[The_Crimson_Son-migration]

I am in a similar situation. My partner and I are both executives at a telecom firm. We maintain both joint and separate assets, and we also collect comics. When I first started going into the professional/dealer side of comics after many years of collecting, consulting for LCS's, and doing comic/art investments for third parties, she was surprised at the price tag of some of the books I had already accumulated as well as current purchases. Her reluctance to be 'OK' with it was noted, and I tip-toed for a while. Until she got to see the industry from behind the booth, so to say. The first convention I brought her along to run booth with me, she got to see that these investments were not only very real and viable, but profitable. That first show with her I bought a copy of ASM #1 for $800 and flipped it the next day for $17,500. Her reluctance disappeared, quickly. By including her, and educating the why's, the why-not's, and everything inbetween, we were able to grow our collections and enjoyment for our hobby.

 

I say bring your partner into the fold, let them experience the joy of acquisition, the rush of negotiation, the profitability of a good flip, and the passion of the culture. Even if they choose not to become a true believer, at least they'll understand why you are.

 

I'd share that nice book you have put away by putting it in a nice CGC display/frame, I bet you'll be pleasantly surprised at how he reacts, or lack thereof! (thumbs u

[axiom94]

I do... and then if I get any flak, I point out that four years ago I bought a ST 110 CGC 6.0 for $400.00 or a TOS 39 CGC 3.0 for $700.00, etc. I then go to eBay sold items and show whoever what they are selling for now. I usually refrain from inquiring as to the net gain whoever has made on their discretionary spending.

[SatansProdigy]

Yep. My wife knows everything I pay. Hell most times she's the one picking up the money orders.

[Logan510]

My wife knows and doesn't care. As long as I can take care of the bills and pay the mortgage, she's cool.

[David Swan]

My wife has no clue. I look at it this way. I make enough money to have a fairly decent amount of discretionary spending. All the bills are paid, we have no debt, I contribute the maximum to my 401k, I'm contributing a significant amount to my two daughters college funds (my oldest at 2 years already has enough to pay for a year at a pretty good college). Although I don't feel particularly guilty I am reducing my spending. I have a monthly budget which I have been slowly reducing. I have one goal in mind and that's to have the best Captain Marvel Adventure collection on the planet and then I'm done. I'm out. My spending is about two to three thousand a year which I'm easily able to absorb.

 

Let me put it this way. My wife grew up in Malaysia and the thought of spending so much on comic books would be inconceivable to her.

[Meeklo]

My girlfriend is extremely strict with money. She knows that I have GSXM #1 and X-Men #1 as I had to ask her for help in those purchases. She does not know how much I really spent on them though. I usually knock a couple of hundred off when telling her.

 

She also does not know I have Hulk 181 and JIM 85.

[surfer99]

Wow, great journal that elicited a lot of various responses. I am in line with oakman. My wife and I have been married 23 years. The secret has been, be honest with each other. Like others have said, bring your partner into your world. They may never love comics, but they will understand and respect your love for them.

[Barlor001-migration]

I have found that telling the wife how much I spent can make my life much easier,and when it is a book over $300 I always talk to her before I bid or buy. It also helps that I took her to England and Scotland for two months last year.

[bagofleas]

If I did have a wife, I would handle it the same way as surfer99 does.