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OT: Post the dumbest message someone sent to you on EBay

Started by TiQuinn,

45 posts in this topic

Pirate

Pirate

Posted
Posted

theres a scambusters site somewhere where they play these people and actually get money out of the scammers. wish i could remember the url frown.gif

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djpinkpanther67

djpinkpanther67

Posted
Posted

I get about 3-4 of the Nigerian "Death Scams" a day here's one...

 

 

David Johnson Chambers.

23, Victoria Island way,

Ikoyi

Lagos -State

Nigeria.

Our ref. au/ret/45673/49

Your ref.................

 

Attn, Sir / Madam

Re: Next of kin to my late client Eng. Adams Drew.

 

I am Barrister David Johnson, a solicitor at law, I am the personal attorney to late Eng.Adams Drew, who used to work with shell - development company in Nigeria. Hereinafter shall be refered to as my client. On April 25th 2005, my client, his wife and three children were involved in a train accident in Japan during their visit to Japan which all the families were dead. Here is some news about the train accident:

 

Click on the web address:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/04/25/AR2005042500187.html

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/4480031.stm

Since then i have made saveral enquiries to your embassy to locate any of my client's extended relatives, but this has also proved unsuccesful. After saveral attempts to locate a member of his family, hence i contacted you. I am contacting you to assist me repatriating the money and properties left behind by my client before they get confiscated or deleared unserviseable to the bank here this huge deposit were lodge. Particularly, the bank where the deseased had an account valued at [12.5million dollars] has issued me a notice to provide the next of kin or have the account confiscated within the next fourteen official working days.

 

Since i have been unsuccessful in locating the relative for the past years, now i seek your consent to present you as the next of kin to my late client. Since you both have the same surname and you are capable of doing this transaction. So that the proceeds of this account valued at [12.5miilion dollars] can be paid to you, then you and i can share the money 60% for me and 30% for you, while 5% will be used to offset all the expenses incurred in the course of this transaction including tax and 5% for the poor in your country. I have all necessary legal documents that can be used to back up our cliams. All i require is your honest co-operation to enable us seeing this transaction through. I guarantee that this will be executed under legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law.

 

Please get in touch with me me by my email and send the following informations to me.

 

Your full name

Residential address

Phone and fax numbers to enable us discuss further about this transaction.

 

Looking forward to your promt response. get back to me through my private email address. barristerdavidjohnson1960@yahoo.com

Best regards to you and your family.

 

Thank you.

Barrister David Johnson

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djpinkpanther67

djpinkpanther67

Posted
Posted

and another.....

 

Hello Dear,

 

I am Mr. Francis Douglas a native of Cape Coast in Ghana and I am an Executive Accountant with the Ghana Department of Mining & Natural Resources and I plea to seek a confidential co-operation with you in the execution of the deal described hereunder for the benefit of all parties.

 

Within the Department of Mining & Natural Resources where I work as an Executive Accountant and with the cooperation of two other top officials, we have in our possession the sum of Seven million, five hundred and sixty thousand United States Dollars ($7,560,000.), which we want to transfer abroad with the assistance and cooperation of a foreign company/individual since we cannot directly operate offshore account due the restriction placed on us by the Ghana Civil Service Code of Conduct.Hence your importance in the whole transaction.

 

This amount $7.560m represents the balance of the total contract value executed on behalf of my Department by a foreign contracting firm, which we the officials over-invoiced deliberately. The actual contract cost have been paid to the original contractor, leaving the balance in the tune of the said amount which have been safely deposited in a security company as a consignment here in Ghana.

 

I have the authority of my partners involved to propose that, should you be willing to assist us in this transaction that is 100% hitch free, your share of the sum will be 25% of the $7.560 million, 70% for us and 5% for taxation and miscellaneous expenses.

 

Endeavor to contact me immediately through my e-mail address, whether or not you are interested in this deal. If you are not, it will enable me scout for another foreign partner to carry out this deal. Please remember to treat this as very confidential as we are still in active Government Service. I have reposed my confidence in you and hope that you will not disappoint me. I wait in anticipation of your fullest co-operation.

 

Yours faithfully,

Mr. Francis Douglas

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djpinkpanther67

djpinkpanther67

Posted
Posted

and of course, this one....

 

 

 

Dear Drew,

 

I am Trevis Kabongo Esq, a legal practitioner, I am the personal attorney to

Mr. Eric C. Drew, a national Of your country, who used to work with Shell

Development Company in Lome, Togo. He used to be my client.

 

On the 7th June, 2004, my client, his wife and their only daughter were

involved in a car accident along Nouvissi express Road. All occupants of the

vehicle unfortunately lost their lives. Since then I have made several

enquiries to your embassy here to locate any of my clients extended

relatives, this has also proved unsuccessful.

 

After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to track his last name

over the Internet, to locate any member of his family hence I contacted

you.I have contacted you to assist in repartrating the fund valued at

US$12.5 million left behind by my client before it gets confisicated or

declared unserviceable by the Security Finance Firm where this huge amount

were deposited.

 

The said Security Finance Company has issued me a notice to provide the next

of kin or have his account confisicated within the next twenty one official

working days.

 

Since I have been unsuccesfull in locating the relatives for over 2years

now, I seek the consent to present you as the next of kin to the deceased

since you have the same last names, so that the proceeds of this account can

be paid to you.

 

Therefore, on receipt of your positive response, we shall then discuss the

sharing ratio and modalities for transfer.I have all necessary information

and legal documents needed to back you up for claim.

 

All I require from you is your honest cooperation to enable us see this

transaction through. I guarantee that this will be executed under legitimate

arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law.

 

Best Regards,

Trevis Kabongo Esq

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Wally's Comics

Wally's Comics

Posted
Posted
Now that is funny. Leaves me wondering if he just decided to mangle it himself.

Maybe I should do a follow up? Its only been about 6 months. He left me positive feedback yay.gif

 

and are you 100% sure that he wasn't just incorrectly asking for a bonus

lower grade "reader" comic?

 

It sounds like that is the only logical explaination other than he's nuts...

 

 

tongue.gif

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finecomics

finecomics

Posted
Posted
Now that is funny. Leaves me wondering if he just decided to mangle it himself.

Maybe I should do a follow up? Its only been about 6 months. He left me positive feedback yay.gif

 

and are you 100% sure that he wasn't just incorrectly asking for a bonus

lower grade "reader" comic?

 

It sounds like that is the only logical explaination other than he's nuts...

 

 

tongue.gif

 

100% certain. I wish I had kept the emails. We emailed each other about 3-4 times over the subject. He had already purchased and paid for the book in the store. He wanted me switch out the NM copy for a lower grade. Said he knew it was a strange request but never really explained himself. confused-smiley-013.gif

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Wally's Comics

Wally's Comics

Posted
Posted
Now that is funny. Leaves me wondering if he just decided to mangle it himself.

Maybe I should do a follow up? Its only been about 6 months. He left me positive feedback yay.gif

 

and are you 100% sure that he wasn't just incorrectly asking for a bonus

lower grade "reader" comic?

 

It sounds like that is the only logical explaination other than he's nuts...

 

 

tongue.gif

 

100% certain. I wish I had kept the emails. We emailed each other about 3-4 times over the subject. He had already purchased and paid for the book in the store. He wanted me switch out the NM copy for a lower grade. Said he knew it was a strange request but never really explained himself. confused-smiley-013.gif

 

It could be possible that he borrowed the book from a friend and something happened

to it. The book was in a certain lower grade which he was looking for and to save him the ebarrassment of having to come clean to the loaner and risk no being able to borrow again -

He was trying to sneak the book undetected back to him. Even more, maybe the

effects that caused the grade we something that only time could create like a soil or sun spot?

 

Who knows...

 

real funny though.

 

 

thumbsup2.gif

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joeypost

joeypost

Posted
Posted
Got this message on Ebay today which made me laugh at its sheer stupidity:

 

I will be sending payment of US $14.70 via Personal Check shortly.

 

Hi, I am puting a check in the mail today. As you can see I have a perfect feedback rating. I hope this will help speed up the amount of time it will take for my check to clear. Thanks

 

Wow!

 

I never knew banks paid any attention to folks' Ebay feedback ratings! He has a whopping 376 positive feedbacks. I'm sure that check will clear just like that! <snap>

 

27_laughing.gif

 

This isn't the dumbest but I get it alot and here is a typical email exchange:

 

Buyer: Hello, I am so and so from Germany. Do you ship overseas? I will pay promptly and with paypal.

 

Me: Please read the product description.

 

Buyer: foreheadslap.gif I need to learn to read better.

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Sal

Sal

Posted
Posted
Got this message on Ebay today which made me laugh at its sheer stupidity:

 

I will be sending payment of US $14.70 via Personal Check shortly.

 

Hi, I am puting a check in the mail today. As you can see I have a perfect feedback rating. I hope this will help speed up the amount of time it will take for my check to clear. Thanks

 

Wow!

 

I never knew banks paid any attention to folks' Ebay feedback ratings! He has a whopping 376 positive feedbacks. I'm sure that check will clear just like that! <snap>

 

27_laughing.gif

 

This isn't the dumbest but I get it alot and here is a typical email exchange:

 

Buyer: Hello, I am so and so from Germany. Do you ship overseas? I will pay promptly and with paypal.

 

Me: Please read the product description.

 

Buyer: foreheadslap.gif I need to learn to read better.

 

you know, if you're getting this a lot, you might want to consider breaking out the shipping part of your template and i dunno, bold it or something. your buyers are trying to tell you something, you should listen to them.

 

flowerred.gif

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joeypost

joeypost

Posted
Posted
Got this message on Ebay today which made me laugh at its sheer stupidity:

 

I will be sending payment of US $14.70 via Personal Check shortly.

 

Hi, I am puting a check in the mail today. As you can see I have a perfect feedback rating. I hope this will help speed up the amount of time it will take for my check to clear. Thanks

 

Wow!

 

I never knew banks paid any attention to folks' Ebay feedback ratings! He has a whopping 376 positive feedbacks. I'm sure that check will clear just like that! <snap>

 

27_laughing.gif

 

This isn't the dumbest but I get it alot and here is a typical email exchange:

 

Buyer: Hello, I am so and so from Germany. Do you ship overseas? I will pay promptly and with paypal.

 

Me: Please read the product description.

 

Buyer: foreheadslap.gif I need to learn to read better.

 

you know, if you're getting this a lot, you might want to consider breaking out the shipping part of your template and i dunno, bold it or something. your buyers are trying to tell you something, you should listen to them.

 

flowerred.gif

 

thumbsup2.gif

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finecomics

finecomics

Posted
Posted
Now that is funny. Leaves me wondering if he just decided to mangle it himself.

Maybe I should do a follow up? Its only been about 6 months. He left me positive feedback yay.gif

 

and are you 100% sure that he wasn't just incorrectly asking for a bonus

lower grade "reader" comic?

 

It sounds like that is the only logical explaination other than he's nuts...

 

 

tongue.gif

 

100% certain. I wish I had kept the emails. We emailed each other about 3-4 times over the subject. He had already purchased and paid for the book in the store. He wanted me switch out the NM copy for a lower grade. Said he knew it was a strange request but never really explained himself. confused-smiley-013.gif

 

It could be possible that he borrowed the book from a friend and something happened

to it. The book was in a certain lower grade which he was looking for and to save him the ebarrassment of having to come clean to the loaner and risk no being able to borrow again -

He was trying to sneak the book undetected back to him. Even more, maybe the

effects that caused the grade we something that only time could create like a soil or sun spot?

 

Who knows...

 

real funny though.

 

 

thumbsup2.gif

 

I didn't even think of that. That's probably about the only logical explanation out there. But then that takes away from the humor sorry.gif

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Wally's Comics

Wally's Comics

Posted
Posted
Now that is funny. Leaves me wondering if he just decided to mangle it himself.

Maybe I should do a follow up? Its only been about 6 months. He left me positive feedback yay.gif

 

and are you 100% sure that he wasn't just incorrectly asking for a bonus

lower grade "reader" comic?

 

It sounds like that is the only logical explaination other than he's nuts...

 

 

tongue.gif

 

100% certain. I wish I had kept the emails. We emailed each other about 3-4 times over the subject. He had already purchased and paid for the book in the store. He wanted me switch out the NM copy for a lower grade. Said he knew it was a strange request but never really explained himself. confused-smiley-013.gif

 

It could be possible that he borrowed the book from a friend and something happened

to it. The book was in a certain lower grade which he was looking for and to save him the ebarrassment of having to come clean to the loaner and risk no being able to borrow again -

He was trying to sneak the book undetected back to him. Even more, maybe the

effects that caused the grade we something that only time could create like a soil or sun spot?

 

Who knows...

 

real funny though.

 

 

thumbsup2.gif

 

I didn't even think of that. That's probably about the only logical explanation out there. But then that takes away from the humor sorry.gif

 

sorry, my father was one of the best detectives in the business

I guess it runs in the blood...

 

 

sorry.gif

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Lazyboy

Lazyboy

Posted
Posted
My personal favorite and to this day still don't understand.....

 

I had an x-men 244 NM in the store for like $5 or $6. Buyer hits the BIN and then asks if he can receive a lower grade copy instead of the NM book.

 

I email him back to ask if he's serious

 

He replies "I know its a strange request, and its not a money issue, I just want a lower grade copy"

 

I offer to "mangle" the copy for him

 

He declines and pays.

 

Weird

 

Maybe he was planning on cutting out interior panels or something and didn't want to destroy a high grade copy. confused-smiley-013.gif

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Point Five

Point Five

Posted
Posted

I don't know what the explanation is, but the guy doesn't seem that much stranger than (say) the guy who collects nothing but copies of Spiderman #43. Let's face it, comic collectors are a bunch of nuts.

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