Best Way to Smuggle Slabs Into the House...

[ArAich]

Sheesh...I'ts not really that I'm "smuggling" the books in...I'm just keeping her out of the loop...as far as finances...I either use Paypal or cash and the wife is well aware of that...especially when I pay for dinner using my Paypal account or hand her a batch of bills...

 

Also...my wife will probaly never comprehend that I just spent $500 on a batch of books in order to sell all but one and make a profit as well...to her it's $500 out the window...the "smuggling" is just a way of alliviating that anguish on her part...it's not done to decieve...

[Artboy99]

My wife threw my books away one weekend when I was out of town as she was tired of being with "a little boy". Gone was my entire collection including my cherished Hulk 1-6. It angered me so much I returned the favor one weekend she was gone and I threw out all but 2 pairs of her 40 pairs of shoes.

Yes I am single now.

But quite frankly, people need to respect each other and their interests.

I encourage a discussion and the budget idea is a great idea. And by the way that budget goes both ways. I am certain she is buying things that you dont like and / or consider she doesnt need. Set equal budgets. Trust me she will "get it" if you bring something personal to her to the issue.

Then again, I am single so my suggestions may not be help at all.

[Escaflown4]

Here's my stance on the subject. First off, if you have a spouse that's totally against your hobby to the point that she forbids it, that's a big sign that she doesn't respect you at all. This sets off a big red flag on how she will deal with other things / issues that she doesn't agree with in the relationship. You got to ask yourself how much you really love her or is it even worth it to live the rest of your life with her in this one-sided relationship. History has shown that one-sided relationships never last long anyways.

 

If finance is the problem, then the best solution is to keep the bank account separate. I can't even think of a good reason why a couple should have a shared account. At this point, you literally have to ask permission every time you want to get something. As long as you keep bill payments and a nice little reserve for rainy days as top priority, then the spouse should have no say on how you spend the rest of your money. The ONLY situation where your spouse should intervene is if she sees you're burying yourself in a deep credit hole with your buying binge. At that point, then you would have to sit down and re-evaluate your spending.

 

Bottom line, the point I'm trying to make is you should NOT have to resort to sneaking books inside your house period.

[joe_collector]

My wife threw my books away one weekend when I was out of town as she was tired of being with "a little boy". Gone was my entire collection including my cherished Hulk 1-6.

 

For real? Sounds like bad news to me, and (as you probably realize) indicative of far deeper issues than funny books.

 

Even my barely-comic-tolerating wife understands their monetary value, and would never just toss them out. Plus, the kids like 'em.

[Fan4Fan]

If the ultimatum ever came down, expect a HUGE FF sales thread

 

 

And your wife's phone number was what, again?

 

[awe4one]

I agree in that if collecting comics bothers her that much you need serious counciling for what's really bothering her.

 

We've only heard one side of the story here. The wife could have a very good reason to be mad...

 

Jim

[joe_collector]

Here's my stance on the subject. First off, if you have a spouse that's totally against your hobby to the point that she forbids it, that's a big sign that she doesn't respect you at all.

 

Open-ended statements like this are pretty well useless.

 

I have a friend who collects very expensive coins, and he's *always* over-spending and his addiction has got them into financial difficulty. His wife gave him an ultimatum, her or the coins, and he's always whining to me about not being able to buy X, Y and Z.

 

 

I don't think his wife is unreasonable, and pretty well tell him he's a jerk when he brings it up. Some people just have no self-control and need to be reigned in.

[jools&jim]

Ha! You think smuggling comics is tough? Try sneaking a monstrosity like this into the house!!!

 

 

(Not, it's not mine...I wish! But my complete Marshall rig from later in the '70s is the same size). I once smuggled a VERY heavy Ampeg combo amp into the house and nearly killed myself running down the steps with it to the basement before the wife caught up with me from the kitchen. I fessed up, and everything was cool -- in fact, she was more p!ssed that I tried to put one over on her than she was about me buying yet another huge, loud guitar amp.

 

But seriously...I agree with lots of guys here who say that honesty is the best policy. It's all give and take, baby. Sometimes when we take, we gotta give a little back -- and vice-versa.

[joe_collector]

If finance is the problem, then the best solution is to keep the bank account separate. I can't even think of a good reason why a couple should have a shared account.

 

Wow, more words of wisdom.

 

Seriously, married couples with joint accounts, with two eyes looking over the finances, do very well financially, while the "we still spend like we're single" separate account chuckleheads are usually living paycheck to paycheck.

[JazzMan]

I've adopted some of the things that have been repeated on the boards: my wife and I give ourselves an allowance to spend on whatever we want, so that's enough to fund some current books and go out to lunch. Whenever I go on business trips I always get milage money for the trip to airport and back which is later reimbursed - this way I have a couple of extra bucks. Recently I told her I think we can make a little more spending money by buying some big ticket books and colelctively we set aside some money and started our project.

 

I've been married for 18 years today (Happy Anniversary to me and my wife! ) and being guilt free is worth every penny. So my advice, as well as many others here: don't smuggle things in, be open and honest. If you can't be right now, you need to find a way to be...you'll sleep better at night and you won't have to take your anxiety medication anymore.

[homerwannabee]

At times like these I am very happy that I am single. In all seriousness though, it is best that you have a sit down talk with the wife. Putting yourself on an allowance sounds like the best idea to me. If the wife is more upset at just seeing these comics. Then put them in a box in the garage and let them sit there. If she can't even stand them being in the garage, then get a storage space for them. Another good suggestion was selling some of your comics from time to time for very real things. For instance, say the wife and you want to go on a vacation, and she says"Where are we going to have the money for that?" Then you can say"Don't worry I will just sell off a couple of my silver age comics in order to fund the trip." Try to convince your wife that your comics are an investment more than they are a hobby. Give some stories of famous comics that have shot up in value. Tell her at every instance when you make a huge profit off one of the comics. Soon she will let you off the hook more because of the investment potential.

[kimik]

It's easy. Sell a couple of books that are easy to replace off and give her some of the funds to buy something for herself (suggest something like shoes). She will be happy that you are placing her above your comic habit and it will buy you at least a few months (if not a year) of get out of jail free cards for new purchases.

 

Nice...

 

Thanks. I buy my new books with funds from selling of dupes/unwanted books, but my wife still gets a little twitchy when I am getting packages in every day for a few weeks on end. She and I have an agreement that as long as it is my mad money and I do not spend our money on comics it is okay, but when I go on a spending spree her wifey senses start tingling and planning on better ways to spend this frivolous cash (e.g. more shoes, repaint the house, new dust collectors...er paintings/decorations, etc.). Remember, happy wife = happy wife so if I am treating myself with more books I try to do the same for her (albeit on a much smaller scale ).

[hockey&comicsguy]

Okay,

 

So I have my own separate mailing address...so I can retrieve my packages unanounced, but now that I have them and past the wife...how do I get them into the house...

 

The "oh, I have been waiting for the package for several weeks" is no longer working and hidding slabs under jacket is not fooling the wife anymore, especially after I have dropped 20 lbs...

 

With more things on the way in the near future, I need some help from fellow boardies...have even taken packages around back to basement door and retrieved them later...of course, doesn't work well when there is bad weather....also tried "have to get something out of the car" trick late at night...

 

Wife kind of understands, but not really....

 

Any suggestions???

 

I'm not sure if this was posted as sort of a joke or not so...

 

If you're seriously having to figure a way to smuggle stuff in I think you've got 2 problems.

 

1. If you're hiding this from your wife for fear of what might happen, you should not be jeopardizing your marriage potentially.

 

2. Dude, how freaking hard is it to get something into your house? Its not like you're trying to smuggle in an elephant or something. What does your wife do, stand by the door and wait for you to walk in? What, you don't own a car? Ever thought about leaving it in your car. Park in the garage (assuming you have one) and go get it when she isn't bird-dogging you.

 

If you can't find a way to smuggle a comic into your own home, I fear for you making your way through life in general.

 

 

[Count]

Okay,

 

So I have my own separate mailing address...so I can retrieve my packages unanounced, but now that I have them and past the wife...how do I get them into the house...

 

The "oh, I have been waiting for the package for several weeks" is no longer working and hidding slabs under jacket is not fooling the wife anymore, especially after I have dropped 20 lbs...

 

With more things on the way in the near future, I need some help from fellow boardies...have even taken packages around back to basement door and retrieved them later...of course, doesn't work well when there is bad weather....also tried "have to get something out of the car" trick late at night...

 

Wife kind of understands, but not really....

 

Any suggestions???

 

Hire a hitman... Problem solved

 

My ex-wife did not understand or like my comic book collecting. Which in the end was good because the books were not viewed as assets when we divided everything up

 

The new fiance also does not care for it. She does however like the GA books...she thinks the covers are cool and she has shown interest in attending the NY Con.

 

I normally explain to her that the books I just purchased were a steal and I could not pass them up. They are worth 5x, 10x 15x more than what I paid for them. That seems to work at times. I also do not disclose how much I've spent on a book if it was a large amount.

 

She does respect that I enjoy collecting as we all need something to keep us ...entertained. It could be worse, I could be out every night at the local bar...right?

 

 

[Wally's Comics]

wow! it's sad to see how many people have issues with this.

 

Our plan is simple, I know my wife is better with the "money"

so all my loot goes into our checking account. She pays the bills,

she does the taxes... (she has an MBA so why not?)

 

I withdraw a tighty sum out for my pleasure

to do what ever I want with it once a month.

 

One thing that really helps is that my wife isn't a spender at all

and she makes 2–3 X more money than I do...

(and I make well above average in my field)

 

It doesn't bother me not being the "bread winner" of the fam.

The wifey is the big business manager at work and other than the

money I manage the household, take care of the kids etc. etc.

 

But I could see if money was tight that spending $500 for book

could be something to explain.

 

Luckily (knock on wood) that's not the case as of now for us.

 

 

 

 

[Annihilus]

In the Annihilus household, all of our money is completely separate. She pays her specific bills (car payment, groceries, etc.) and Annihilus pays for all of his. Community bills are split. Any money left over belongs to the respecitve party and we don't care what each other does with the money.

 

Either one of us could come home with an albino giraffe or a NM copy of ASM #1 and the other wouldn't give a hoot (other than who has to clean up the giraffe poop).

 

Our money is absolutely separate (always has been and always will be, unless we care to make a joint purchase like a couch or something)....and after two failed marriages, it's a no-brainer for both of us at this point and works quite well. We have never fought about money (or comics) in the 7 years we've been together. It's just not an issue because our finances are completely separate.

 

The only thing she person_without_enough_empathyez about are all the empty boxes and packing materials laying around in our 2nd bedroom waiting for Annihilus's first big sales thread

[Ringfinger]

I have no chance, my kids get the mail!!

[Escaflown4]

Here's my stance on the subject. First off, if you have a spouse that's totally against your hobby to the point that she forbids it, that's a big sign that she doesn't respect you at all.

 

Open-ended statements like this are pretty well useless.

 

I have a friend who collects very expensive coins, and he's *always* over-spending and his addiction has got them into financial difficulty. His wife gave him an ultimatum, her or the coins, and he's always whining to me about not being able to buy X, Y and Z.

 

 

I don't think his wife is unreasonable, and pretty well tell him he's a jerk when he brings it up. Some people just have no self-control and need to be reigned in.

 

Looks like someone didn't read the rest of my post...otherwise there wouldn't have been a need for this reply...

[Escaflown4]

If finance is the problem, then the best solution is to keep the bank account separate. I can't even think of a good reason why a couple should have a shared account.

 

Wow, more words of wisdom.

 

Seriously, married couples with joint accounts, with two eyes looking over the finances, do very well financially, while the "we still spend like we're single" separate account chuckleheads are usually living paycheck to paycheck.

 

This sounds more like a stereotypical phrase. What you say is only true for a couple that cannot control their spending urges. However, this sounds more like you're under the assumption that all couples with separate accounts fall in this category. You'll be surprised that a lot of couples actually do pretty well on separate accounts. Not only that, there are usually far less stress involved without a watchdog hounding behind every transaction made. Don't forget with a joint account, the money is no longer yours....it becomes "OURS" and that generates far more arguments then what it's worth.

[bronzilla]

Okay,

 

So I have my own separate mailing address...so I can retrieve my packages unanounced, but now that I have them and past the wife...how do I get them into the house...

 

The "oh, I have been waiting for the package for several weeks" is no longer working and hidding slabs under jacket is not fooling the wife anymore, especially after I have dropped 20 lbs...

 

With more things on the way in the near future, I need some help from fellow boardies...have even taken packages around back to basement door and retrieved them later...of course, doesn't work well when there is bad weather....also tried "have to get something out of the car" trick late at night...

 

Wife kind of understands, but not really....

 

Any suggestions???

 

 

 

quit kidding yourself...she knows everything...the wives have a sixth sense for even the most subtle change in our behavoir or guilty/funny look on our faces. Try boldly walking in the door with your new purchases, show them to her, and get her a little gift for being such an understanding wife. If she gets something everytime you get something, you can turn this whole thing around, and she'll start asking when your next book is coming so she can get her treat.

 

It's kinda little ringing a bell when it's time to eat for your dog, and he starts to salivate.

 

Steve

Dude... you are so going to catch hell from the ladies on this forum!!