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'tis better to give than recieve...

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happy b-day araich, here we go:

 

a guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "hey line me up fifteen shots of whiskey." the bartenders asks "wow fifteen shots? what's the occassion?" the guy replies "i just got laid" the bartender then proceeds with "hell let me buy you a shot of tequila." pours the guy a shot of tequila and he slams it, then says, "nope, i can still taste her, give me the fifteen shots of whiskey."

 

another one:

 

a very drunk man sitting at the bar says to the bartender " hey, i shagged your mum" the bartender ignores the drunk man's statement. the drunk man then says, "hey, i shagged your mum in the arse and it was good" the bartender continues to ignore the drunk man's statement. the drunk man then says, "hey i shagged your mum last night 4 times and she swallowed on everyone." finally agitated, the bartender says to the drunk man, "go home dad, your drunk."

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Well, thanks to everybody who took the time out to make me laugh. Everybody had some funny stuff to post and I at least snickered at them all.

As I announce the winner first let me make clear that I grew up on Mel Brooks movies and found that I laugh the hardest at the simplest most forthright, and yes dumb, jokes. Hence the joke that made me laugh the hardest was the 1st posted by drbanner (PM me so that I can send you the books) about the bear and the rabbit.

 

Honorable mention goes to Bugaboo whose stories were funny (and long) and was a close second.

Also kudos to CI for being persistant as he submitted no less than 7 jokes (each one very funny as they included board members).

 

Thanks everybody, you made my day. laugh.gif

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Well, there is always next year.

 

Your chance may come sooner than you think! wink.gif

 

I believe the bear joke came from Murphy (Eddie) in response to Bill Cosby's accusations that he couldn't tell a funny joke without using the "F" word.

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Nah, I'm just a competitive guy with sense of humor. I was literally laughing out loud while typing the hot-dog bit, which is usually an indication it's a wiener.

 

After seven CI-specials (complete with forum members -especially yours bug's-) and a goose egg to show for it, I'm feeling my efforts are wasted here. grin.gif

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Don't be so disgruntled CI...how were you to know that I hate hot dogs...give me a Mcfish any day...

 

You have hit upon two of the holy trinity... hot dogs, McFish, and McRib. And how you can speak against the dogs is beyond me. What do you eat at ballgames?? What are you, you monster?!?!? CANADIAN???

 

 

 

 

(a joke, and yes, I've read the other thread)

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And how you can speak against the dogs is beyond me. What do you eat at ballgames

 

$3.50 (or more???) for a Fenway frank...I don't think so..Pretzals and mustard man...thats where it's at...

 

Oh...and I hate apple pie too... tongue.gif

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Could have been worse C.I..... Jens could have won again

 

I highly doubt it, as this contest was a bit higher on the IQ scale than quadruple-guessing at a trivia contest.

 

Here's an example of a Jens joke:

 

What's black and white and red all over?

 

A newspaper.. or maybe it's an exploding skunk.. or just in case this question is a trick one, a zebra with a sunburn... and just to cover all my bases, a blushing nun. But just to be sure, I'd also say a penguin with diaper rash.

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$3.50 (or more???) for a Fenway frank...I don't think so..Pretzals and mustard man...thats where it's at...

 

Fenway... :::swoon::: Now I'm all excited for another summer of pennant-chasing, 100-game-losing excitement with the Royals! But they do have some goooood hot dogs. And every so often they have $1 hot dog/$1 Pepsi/$1 peanut night! BOOYA! Only what? 5 more months? 4? What day is it? Where am I??

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