Fights with your wives or significant others over comics?

[Silent Master]

My significant other also likes comic books, so whenever he gives me carp I laugh in his face.

 

Yeap, when my spouse gives me carp or catfish either one I laugh in her face too.

 

 

[bluerosekiller]

 

It's been an fairly tight month for us because I had to put a wad of cash down to pay a fee for my return to school in September.

 

 

Did you try getting tap/pel?

 

Going to Buffalo State?

 

Yep. In fact, I just got my approval letter for Federal yesterday.

The $$$ I had to pay was actually for something that a previous student loan failed to cover WAY back in the early '80s when I initially went to school.

Talk about a blast from the past, huh?

 

Nope. NCCC.

[bluerosekiller]

If it's causing real arguments...it's time to stop. (thumbs u

 

Nope. Not something that I'm willing to do.

Perhaps a rather harsh stance to take, but at 49 years of age I'm very much a grown man who's capable of making decisions for myself. And, I'm not willing to quit doing something that brings me so much joy & that I believe that i've been quite responsible about.

I don't drink ( I stopped completely years ago ), don't smoke ( never have ), don't purchase drugs ( the only one's I'm on are prescribed to me, other than the very occasional social use of pot, which is always someone else's ) & certainly don't cheat on her.

My mid-life crisis?

Returning to comic collecting after 30 years.

My selling off of my collection back in 1980 left a good sized hole in me that was never quite filled by my other collections.

Which BTW, I curbed significantly or put into hiatus once I began collecting comics again.

Action figures? Haven't purchased one in a year.

DVDs/Blu-Rays? I buy many less than I did 12 months ago.

Horror fiction hardcovers/trade paperbacks ect. ? I've cut down a bit, but still have to keep up enough with books because my wife is an even more voracious reader than I am.

Boxing memorabilia? Other than my monthly purchase of THE RING magazine which I've been doing since 1976 ) & the occasional trade, my boxing collection has pretty much gone into a state of hiatus for the forseeable future.

My vintage monster magazines? Well, I sort of, kind of lump that into my comic book collecting. Though, once I add a copy of CASTLE OF FRANKENSTEIN #3 to complete my collection of that particular title, I doubt I'll be purchasing any more of them for a while in order to put my available funds for comics.

 

WHEW!

Sorry to have gone off on such a rant to your reply.

It's just that when my wife used the things on our budget that are supposedly "my luxuries" such as our DirectTV bill & our Verizon internet bill & lumped them in with my comics, I felt it was REALLY unfare. 'Cause she uses the television a lot more than I do & enjoys the internet as well.

[bluerosekiller]

We really don't argue except on the rare occassion when we like can't decide if we should do the grandkid's room in DC or Marvel characters..or try to teach them diversity...

 

Our wedding was DC..obviously..

 

Prefire we used long boxes as coffee tables and such I can understand the thought that maybe someone with a very huge collection could have a problem with it..but be honest some girls collect stupid unicorns,or beanie babies, barbies..etc..they don't take up as much room as long boxes but ..a barbie or beanie cannot substitue for a foot stool or end table..

 

Well now, see?

That's the perfect scenario you have with your hubby.

Not that I'd trade my wife in for anyone in the world, but you've GOT to both know that you've got him over the long boxes big time. 'Cause if he ever screws up too badly, then every comic geek & aficionado out there would be trying like crazy to get you off the open market!

[aggr1103]

 

There's also the really primitive aspect of someone forcing a spouse to get rid of a hobby because they want to prove that they mean more than the hobby. Pretty lame.

 

 

I guess my point in addressing what you called 'envy' sits right on the perspective you described here. If they want to prove they mean more than the hobby, then evidently the spouse with the hobby isn't showing his significant other how much they really mean to them. There's a communication breakdown. If the hobby is more important than the significant other then the hobbyist should just let them go. I think alot of the time the blame is placed on the spouse who doesn't like the hobby. Most of the time the blame can be split amongst both parties. I think pacifying the angered spouse/significant other is not a permanent solution either.

 

Nothing tangible I own or am involved in is more important than my wife and family. That includes my job, my hobbies, and my things. I make sure they know that too. I didn't always, but I do now.

[bluerosekiller]

 

There's also the really primitive aspect of someone forcing a spouse to get rid of a hobby because they want to prove that they mean more than the hobby. Pretty lame.

 

 

I guess my point in addressing what you called 'envy' sits right on the perspective you described here. If they want to prove they mean more than the hobby, then evidently the spouse with the hobby isn't showing his significant other how much they really mean to them. There's a communication breakdown. If the hobby is more important than the significant other then the hobbyist should just let them go. I think alot of the time the blame is placed on the spouse who doesn't like the hobby. Most of the time the blame can be split amongst both parties. I think pacifying the angered spouse/significant other is not a permanent solution either.

 

Nothing tangible I own or am involved in is more important than my wife and family. That includes my job, my hobbies, and my things. I make sure they know that too. I didn't always, but I do now.

 

And I do my best to do that as well.

Though I may have come across in my previous posts as some sort of an oaf who goes into my comics & collectibles room & locks himself in while ignoring my family & spending out grocery money on comics, that's just not the case.

I think the fact that her comments the other day were so out of left field is what caused me to bring it here to the boards. Because, I hadn't really experienced anything like it before with her.

My LAST significant other?!!

Now, that's a TOTALLY different story.

Her & I never married though we were in a relationship for close to nine years & had two children together. And she was/is a good mom, but not a good mate for me at all, because she was very controlling. And her control began with my wallet. She resented all of my hobbies & wanted every red cent accounted for.

NOTHING like my wife.

Had I ever decided to begin collecting comics again whilst with her, I'd have likely gotten locked out of the house for just suggesting it!

 

So, see, dispite the other day's misunderstanding, I DO definitely appreciate my wife.

Honestly, after a full day or two to ponder it all & after reading through this thread of ours ( & you've all helped loads with your commentary my friends ), I think I may have been a bit too sensitive to her words. I forgot to take into proper account how she's feeling, what with my going back to school & such. Even though it won't hurt us financially at all ( aside from that bit I had to pay the college last week ) , it is a big change & something that I'd only just decided on doing over the course of the past month or two. So, again, IMO I a bit was out of line for overreacting.

[mycs]

A lesson I learned from Peg Bundy a long time ago and found to be true based upon personal experience ( girlfriends, now married over a decade ) is this -- women do not like it when you're having fun without them --- and if that fun that you're having without her also involves spending a decent amount of coin then that is doubly bad.The options are to either get her interested in your hobby, curtail your hobby , or get rid of the GF. If I had a time machine I know which I'd do . I'm only half kidding here.

[Silver]

my wife likes the money I don't spend on comics more than the money I do spend on comics...

[Jonesin4Comics]

I think perspective helps also. My wife could never understand how I could spend so much money on comics. Then, the other day, she wanted to come with me. A TPB and several books later (all recommended by the helpful crew), I was giving her grief about costing me so much money.

 

Now, every week I get, "Where are my books? Did you get them? Why aren't they out yet?"

 

 

I love it!

Not to mention, half the stuff I get at Cons I couldn't without her. It is so much more fun with her by my side

[Artboy99]

I think perspective helps also. My wife could never understand how I could spend so much money on comics. Then, the other day, she wanted to come with me. A TPB and several books later (all recommended by the helpful crew), I was giving her grief about costing me so much money.

 

Now, every week I get, "Where are my books? Did you get them? Why aren't they out yet?"

 

 

I love it!

Not to mention, half the stuff I get at Cons I couldn't without her. It is so much more fun with her by my side

 

I am jealous of this, and is all I ever wanted from my Ex. She expected me to take an interest in HER interests, but wanted nothing to do with mine. Her ultimatum style / controlling nature just was not a positive thing for me.

She couldn't seem to grasp the concept that I was NOT spending "our" money on comics, and that my budget for buying books came from selling my old toys / comics and buying other books or from my part time employment.

 

Ah well I am better off.

[Jonesin4Comics]

I feel you brother, you are better off alone than with someone that doesn't let you enjoy what you love.

 

But if you do find her, make sure you keep her happy

[Artboy99]

I feel you brother, yoiu are better off alone than with someone that doesn't let you enjoy what you love.

 

But if you do find her, make sure you keep her happy

 

Absolutely! It is a give and take thing, and I would expect her to also make me happy in return.

[conditionfreak]

What is a "significant other"?

 

Is that someone you like a lot, but not enough to marry? Is it like a "friend with benefits"? Or is it what they refer to as "BFF"?

[oakman29]

What is a "significant other"?

 

Is that someone you like a lot, but not enough to marry? Is it like a "friend with benefits"? Or is it what they refer to as "BFF"?

 

Or it could mean.............

 

Not that there's anything wrong with that!

[MR SigS]

Of course not.

[spidrvacc]

My wife does not mind But I still remember some of my girlfriends having a issue. I used to have purchases sent to work. or leave it in my car and sneak it in. ofcourse I cant just go buy a $500 book. Would need to discuss with her spending anything over say $100.

 

On the same subject but not comic related. I remember going to Vegas to meet my future inlaws. My future dad in law said we were going to the range.. grabbed his golf clubs in the bag. We went to a Golf store that had a range. He purchased a new set like $800 and told me to say I purchased a used set for $100 so she would never know about it. Funny way to meet a guy. Then after finding out I always anted to go to Area 51 he drove me up. On the way back he got a speeding ticket . like $150 dollars . Again she still does not know to this day. Sometimes you gotta keep large purchases from the wife I guess ( or tickets)

[asteroid-comix]

My wife does not mind the comics. Every now and then I'll catch her flipping through a TPB or a book that I've left on the table. She really likes the OA.

 

Some of the female covers catch her attention and the eyebrow will go up.

 

She made a small fuss when I took over one of the guest bedrooms for storage.

 

We agreed earlier in the year on an annual limit for comics. Does not matter how much I spend on any one book, as long as I don't bust that before tax time. Seems to be working pretty well this year as I'm about half way through my budget

 

 

[rjpb]

My wife doesn't object to what I spend on comics (and is happy that I've sold more than I've bought dollarwise in the last few years), and since I handle all the finances, she has no way of knowing unless I tell her, but what I get continued grief for is the amount of space they take up, even though I've tried to keep that from growing.

 

She knew I collected to some degree when we were married, but then I had maybe three long boxes of mostly undergrounds. Now it's two and a half closets packed with boxes - and that's what really bugs her. Honestly, if much of the newer stuff I've picked up over the last 25 years were easier to get rid of, I probably would, and I have dumped some stuff I don't care about anymore, but most of what I have left I still like too much to just toss, and it takes almost more effort than it's worth to sell.

[BaltimoreLauren]

My significant other also likes comic books, so whenever he gives me carp I laugh in his face.

 

Yeap, when my spouse gives me carp or catfish either one I laugh in her face too.

 

 

 

I thank these boards for giving me new words in my vocabulary, with carp being one of them. Always gets a laugh out of my friends!

[Wayne Enterprises]

The number one cause for divorce is marriage.

Just minimize your collecting for a little while and when the funds are better just buy everything all together.