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Crisis On Infinite Message Boards
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Started by Illiterati-migration,

1,204 posts in this topic

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Architecht

Architecht

Posted
  • Administrator
Posted
Maybe if I call her out House she will appear again it worked last time.

 

JOANNA ......JOANNA.....YOOO-HOOOO JOANNA!!!!! smirk.gif

 

By the way House whats up with the Gerber Photo Journals?..no PM response frown.gif

 

Don't call her an out house. That's rude. 893naughty-thumb.gifinsane.gif

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lighthouse

lighthouse

Posted
Posted
Maybe if I call her out House she will appear again it worked last time.

 

JOANNA ......JOANNA.....YOOO-HOOOO JOANNA!!!!! smirk.gif

 

By the way House whats up with the Gerber Photo Journals?..no PM response frown.gif

 

Don't call her an out house. That's rude. 893naughty-thumb.gifinsane.gif

 

Okay, now THAT was just plain funny... 893Funny-thumb.gif

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blutobc

blutobc

Posted
Posted

Ah, to be the forgotten one...not a shill...but apparently not human either...maybe I need to get ARCH to verify my IP address as I'm sure none of you guys/gals are located within many miles of my location.(and I'm not computer literate to know how to make a fake ID)

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Joanna

Joanna

Posted
Posted
Ah, to be the forgotten one...not a shill...but apparently not human either...maybe I need to get ARCH to verify my IP address as I'm sure none of you guys/gals are located within many miles of my location.(and I'm not computer literate to know how to make a fake ID)

 

You may have joined that thread after I'd written the newbie portion of the story. But there's an opening for a character called The Outhouse...

 

 

-- Joanna

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blutobc

blutobc

Posted
Posted (edited)

Outhouse?

 

Woodshed maybe....because alot of things happen out behind the woodshed you know. Unlike the outhouse where...well, the possible outcomes are extremely limited(fill in your pun here).

 

I was "outed" along with Aces. But thats okay. I enjoy reading Crisis anyway. Although I still like my original post that suggested my being a Star Trek "red shirt" where I could be introduced and immediatly die thereafter(He's dead.............................. ........................................ ........................................ ........................................ ........................................ ................................................Jim)

Edited by Architecht
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BigMan

BigMan

Posted
Posted
Maybe if I call her out House she will appear again it worked last time.

 

JOANNA ......JOANNA.....YOOO-HOOOO JOANNA!!!!! smirk.gif

 

By the way House whats up with the Gerber Photo Journals?..no PM response frown.gif

 

Don't call her an out house. That's rude. 893naughty-thumb.gifinsane.gif

 

blush.gif I knew I should of listened in my English Classes when they were discussing punctuation. smirk.gif

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Joanna

Joanna

Posted
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Issue 11, Part 3: Time keeps on slippin', slippin'...

 

Featured in this story:

 

(otis)

(Aces)

mrwoogieman)

(Fokker)

(dillmeister)

(blutobc)

Mylite (greggy) slabbed, irresistible

Snowball (The Beyonder) goo

Runt (BigMan) Shrinking power

Ding Dong (Aman) goo

Pluto (hkp) flight, ice

Saturn (Odin) flight, energy rings

Rerun (Araich) TV in belly

Origami (Kevthemev) power over paper

Magic Tape (Scottish) stickiness

The Brick (Crisco) invulnerable

Spelling Bee (PovertyRow) flight, stinger

Uranus (Old Guy) flight, noxious scent

Alias (Bonds) can split into 12

Emoticon (BachelorOfComix) can be any emoticon

Fruit Pie (JLA All the Way) goo

 

 

 

In the Pool of Infinite Mystery, The Lurkers are experiencing strange and incredibly painful transformations.

 

"Man, this transformation is strange!" says Fokker.

 

"And incredibly painful!" adds otis.

 

"I dunno. Doesn't feel too bad," says Aces. "I once had a root canal without Novocain and this is only a wee bit worse. I thought it was going to be really horrifying -- like listening to an entire CD of Celine Dion."

 

"You monster!" shouts mrwoogieman. "That's beyond imagining!"

 

Woogie tries to swim away from the others to have a mental breakdown, but the surface of the pool is thick with red algae and rotten kelp. Granted, it's better than listening to Celine, but not by a whole lot.

 

"What're you guys doing?" asks blutobc. He's still wearing the suit he wore to court.

 

"Did you beat the ticket?" asks dillmeister between screams of pain.

 

"Nah. They had me cold."

 

"What'd you do?" asks Aces backstroking toward Bluto.

 

"The time police caught me watching future porn in the Portal of Eternity."

 

"Damn! Break the prime directive, why don't you! So why aren't you in death row?"

 

"I mistyped the date. In1899 all they had were semi-nude playing cards where overweight women wearing pantaloons looked over their shoulders and winked at the camera. The judge found me too pathetic to sentence to death. So I got community service."

 

"What do you have to do?"

 

"Get the scum out of the Pool of Infinite Mystery. So c'mon, guys, out you go."

 

"You calling us scum?" asks Fokker.

 

"No. Didn't any of you notice the 3 feet of slime on top of the water?"

 

"We did... but we thought that was normal," mumbles Aces.

 

"It's deadly red algae and rotten kelp, so get out before you get sick!"

 

"Oh man!"

 

"Ewww!"

 

They quickly leave the pool and realize that they have been dyed red, head to toe.

 

"We thought the pool would give us powers.

Instead it's turned us into flowers!" they all say in unison.

 

"What the hell?" says blutobc. "What's with the rhymes? And the unison?"

 

"We don't know, must be pollution.

Save us, please! Find a solution!"

 

"What am I supposed to do about it?"

 

"Do something fast! Oh, this is krap!

This isn't poetry, not even rap.

We sound like a retarded chorus.

If we talk much longer, we'll even bore us!"

 

"Man, that is really lame. I take it that's not a talent pool?"

 

"Bluto, please, just get some help

or we'll strangle you with rotted kelp!"

 

"All right, all right. Don't get your iambic pentameters in a bundle. I'll drive you to the emergency room or something."

 

"Thank you! Phew! But please be quick.

Our underwear has begun to stick."

 

Bluto sees that although they are all rubbing at the red coloring furiously, it isn't coming off. Then he realizes that the motions they're making are all in unison. It's as though they're becoming a collective -- one mind, one really bad rhyme. "Yeah, I'll hurry. This is getting freaky. Get in." They all jump into the back seat of his car, suddenly fused at the elbows. "You insufficiently_thoughtful_persons are like a giant, red paper doll. Wait'll the rest of the guys see this."

 

"No! Please no!

Just Go! Go! Go!"

 

"Heh." Bluto has other plans.

 

Meanwhile...

 

Still stuck in the time stream, the legion of forum heroes and villains sit around playing cards, jacks, and 20 questions. Mylite plays a lonely harmonica, his slab slumped against the swirling wall of time.

 

"Are you bigger than a breadbox?" asks Snowball.

 

"Yes," says Runt.

 

"Are you animal, vegetable, or mineral?" asks Ding Dong.

 

"Yes or no questions only."

 

"Okay, animal?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Are you a Balineese Gaboon?" asks Pluto.

 

"No."

 

"I don't think there are Gaboons in Bali," says Saturn.

 

"Gaboons are monkeys, right? Or are they snakes?" Rerun isn't sure. If only he'd watched more Animal Planet!

 

"Doesn't matter, that's not who I am," says Runt.

 

"There's a Gaboon Viper, I think," says Origami.

 

"And Gibbons. Those are monkeys, aren't they?" says Magic Tape.

 

"So a Gaboon and a Gibbon are two different animals. Which one is found on the island of Bali?"

 

"I'M NOT A BALINEESE GABOON!!!!" shouts Runt.

 

"Shut up, Runt. We're trying to decide something here."

 

"You're supposed to be playing 20 questions! I'll give you a hint: I used to be a co-host with Regis Philben."

 

"I'm fairly certain Regis never had a monkey or a snake as a co-host, so that can't be right. Don't worry, we'll get this." The Brick is proud of his intimate knowledge of daytime TV.

 

"Psst!" whispers Bee, interrupting their thrilling game. "Guys, over here. We have some theories."

 

"About Gaboons and Gibbons?"

 

"Leeza Gibbons! She used to be Regis's co-host! I win! I win!" says Uranus.

 

"It's not Leeza Gibbons, it's Kathy Lee!" shouts Runt, but no one hears him.

 

"We have a plan," says Bee. "A plan to get us out of the time stream."

 

"No kidding? What is it?"

 

"Listen closely. Bzz bzz bzzz..."

 

"I can't hear you," says Alias.

 

"Yeah, speak up," says Emoticon.

 

"You know, when you whisper, you really do sound just like a bee," says Fruit Pie. The others shush him. "Well, he does."

 

"Fine, I'll speak up, but we'll need someone to distract Mr. FBI and Mr. INS over there.

 

"I'll do it," says Mylite. "I'm irresistible. It's my power. They won't be able to ignore me."

 

As Mylite heads toward their captors, Bee outlines the plan.

 

To be continued...

 

Edited by Joanna
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Joanna

Joanna

Posted
Posted
Joanna, kudos on your "introduction" in the latest CGC eNews. Love the article. Can I have your autograph? 893applaud-thumb.gif

 

Thanks, Boc! I was really happy to get the opportunity to write the articles for them. And Steve's intro was so kind.

 

-- Joanna

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greggy

greggy

Posted
Posted (edited)
Anyone want to read more of the story tonight? I could be talked into writing more. Just need a little encouragement to get over my laziness.

 

-- Joanna

Do it for me? 893crossfingers-thumb.gif

 

WW199.JPG

Edited by greggy
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