I always wonder why people who feel this way, would want to stay here.
These boards happen to be wonderful. I don't know what other boards you frequent, but if they say these boards have a bad reputation they are probably posts from jealous people who were tossed off.
Why not simply apologize to your Secret Santa? Any slabbed comic is a generous gift, I can't imagine one that would cost less than $15.
Then after taking some time to reflect, just take a deep breath and think a little before you complain so quickly.
These boards are populated by humans and humans are not perfect. Remember that "to err is human" stuff, to forgive is "divine"? Perhaps the person who sent you the slab thought you would enjoy it, crack or no crack?
Hopefully after a while, you will feel more at home, join in and enjoy yourself.
If you can't, and you are SO unhappy, it might be a good idea to take a short voluntary vacation and ask yourself before you return, why you want to be a member of these boards.
:cloud9: