the pursuit of nostalgia vs. living in the present 6 6

[COI]

On 8/9/2023 at 8:29 AM, lostboys said:

Damn...this thread went off the tracks.

 

Nostalgia is no different than eating a good burger or getting laid. 

There is nothing negative about it.

We are all gonna die...every last one of us.

We already spend most of the prime of our lives working jobs for money because we have no better options.

So with the little "you" time you do get, do whatever makes you happy and avoid looking for the dark corners of everything that seems bright.

 

I don't think this thread went off the tracks at all. The question posed in the original post was about balance.

The problem with this is that eating a good burger or getting laid CAN be negative if burgers and sex become a crutch you rely on to get through the day. That's imbalance.

This will be a problem for some people and not for others. Nostalgia is not all positive; it is bitter-sweet by definition, and for some it's more bitter than sweet. 

[Ken Aldred]

On 8/9/2023 at 3:50 PM, SeniorSurfer said:

If you have the good fortune to have had a great, memorable childhood then there's nothing wrong about looking upon it with fondness whenever.

I agree. That’s the healthy, pure side of the nostalgia spectrum.

[troydivision1]

This thread has had some wonderful perspectives and counter perspectives regarding comics.
I can only add my thoughts as an also Gen-X comic 'collector' since grade school.
A (hyperbolic) line I have shared across multiple relationships over the years is -
Star Wars is my first love, comic books my second, everything else comes after that.

Preinternet / cable / VCR / videogame systems comics were my everyday companions.
Rainy days, traveling in the car between homes, school lunches...

True story - 
I never drank or did drugs in high school because at one point all my friends that were into comics with me discovered girls.
Then they stopped being into comics / wanting to ride our bikes on Wednesdays.
I honestly couldn't imagine dropping something that brought me so much joy in my life like they had.

I quit collecting comics the first time during college / working fulltime / getting my own place.
There wasn't really money left over for them.

Then I rekindled my love in 2009 when I read The Walking Dead after it was featured in G4's Comic Con special.
I dove head first back in.
Got (almost) all the items on my to-do list.
Todd McFarlane / Frank Miller / Stan Lee signatures...
Made my inner 'child' super happy.

I even had the opportunity to get a book signed that I only ever dreamt of.
Suddenly, nothing in the comics space (or life) mattered anymore.
I quit the boards for two years and lived life.

I've since come back but honestly, I have maybe a handful of books left on my 'want' list.
(none of which are recent releases)
I don't read comics anymore.  Although, I certainly read about comics quite often.
I'm still here every other day or so reading about comics and the various shenanigans associated with the boards.

I guess this is a long winded way of sharing that comics had their time and place in my lifetime for a long time.
Now that time and place is more in the past than the recent present.
 

Edited August 9, 2023 by troydivision1

[lizards2]

On 8/9/2023 at 10:49 AM, D2 said:

How do I balance it?

You cannot have a balanced attack until you can balance a tack-hammer on your head.

[Randall Dowling]

At first, I wasn't interested in this thread as I don't dwell overly much on nostalgia.  However, as I've read responses, I'm really impressed at hearing more about board members and their lives and memories.

I'm reminded of this quote from the first season finale of Mad Men by the title of this thread:

"Nostalgia - its delicate, but potent. Teddy told me that in Greek nostalgia literally means “the pain from an old wound.” It’s a twinge in your heart far more powerful than memory alone."

Perhaps it's this definition that makes me return to the present when I consider "better times" in my life when I was young.  I don't want to live in the past more than I exist in the present.  Because there are some pretty wonderful things about the time I live in now, I just have to remind myself of what those things are.

Having said all of this, my collection increasingly is really centered on either books that I really wanted as a kid, like this book:

And books that were really special that I bought and owned as a kid but sold over the years so I found new copies that have that fresh feeling I remember.  This is an example of that.

Last, there is the new territory of collecting that I've discovered for myself, not comics, but other very cool ephemera like non-comic magazines from the 30s-70s and paperbacks from the 50s-60s.  Both areas are undiscovered country to me and so the joy of exploration and research and education is back.  It's not that I know everything about comics (far from it), but at one time or another, I've collected most genres of comics so there aren't that many surprises anymore.  With these other books, I've spent hundreds of hours scouring the internet and found so many blogs and resources where wonderful examples abound.  The world is a much bigger place than it was before and, for me, that's a good thing.

Edited August 10, 2023 by Randall Dowling
this first

[lostboys]

On 8/9/2023 at 3:08 PM, Gonzimodo said:

It was very eye-opening to me when my grandmother died and my family went out to a storage unit to go through her stuff.  She had been in a nursing home for a couple years and put almost everything she owned into this unit.  I ended up taking her old folding card table, a small glass vase, and a funny coffee mug.  I don't remember if my siblings took anything at all, and I believe most of her stuff eventually went into the trash.  It was sad to see, because I know those things probably meant a lot to her at some point, and I felt like a vulture going through it, then discarding most of it.

I just don't want my stuff to be a burden to my family when I'm gone.  Assuming I'm still around, I'll be spending my retirement years converting as much as I can into cold, hard cash.

 

My grandmothers furniture is in my basement because if I didnt take it, it was going to the dump...no one wanted any of it.

Am I ever going to use it? I dont think so but I just couldnt stomach seeing it get trashed. To me, the table she made breakfast for me to eat on so many times was not worthless. Nor was the chair she sat in to watch tv every night.

 

Quick story. I worked at a law firm that did a lot of estate stuff. They settled a case involving family members squabbling over money and other valuables. When the case was over, I was tasked with shredding the documents. Along with those document were a dozen or so huge photo albums. They held pics going back to the 1940s. I sat there looking through them and it just depressed the chit out of me.

These folks took the time to preserve these memories for future relatives and NO ONE cared. They had zero value to them. They just had them destroyed.

 

 

[Robot Man]

On 8/9/2023 at 3:01 PM, Chamber of Chills said:

This thread has had some wonderful perspectives and counter perspectives regarding comics.
I can only add my thoughts as an also Gen-X comic 'collector' since grade school.
A (hyperbolic) line I have shared across multiple relationships over the years is -
Star Wars is my first love, comic books my second, everything else comes after that.

Preinternet / cable / VCR / videogame systems comics were my everyday companions.
Rainy days, traveling in the car between homes, school lunches...

True story - 
I never drank or did drugs in high school because at one point all my friends that were into comics with me discovered girls.
Then they stopped being into comics / wanting to ride our bikes on Wednesdays.
I honestly couldn't imagine dropping something that brought me so much joy in my life like they had.

I quit collecting comics the first time during college / working fulltime / getting my own place.
There wasn't really money left over for them.

Then I rekindled my love in 2009 when I read The Walking Dead after it was featured in G4's Comic Con special.
I dove head first back in.
Got (almost) all the items on my to-do list.
Todd McFarlane / Frank Miller / Stan Lee signatures...
Made my inner 'child' super happy.

I even had the opportunity to get a book signed that I only ever dreamt of.
Suddenly, nothing in the comics space (or life) mattered anymore.
I quit the boards for two years and lived life.

I've since come back but honestly, I have maybe a handful of books left on my 'want' list.
(none of which are recent releases)
I don't read comics anymore.  Although, I certainly read about comics quite often.
I'm still here every other day or so reading about comics and the various shenanigans associated with the boards.

I guess this is a long winded way of sharing that comics had their time and place in my lifetime for a long time.
Now that time and place is more in the past than the recent present.
 

I don’t think I have ever given up comics or collecting other stuff. Sure, growing up my interests shifted. I got married, had kids, a career ect. And my collecting slowed down quite a bit. I have always been a sponge for reading everything. I always enjoyed the “hunt” and the thrill of discovery. I have never lost it. 

[Robot Man]

On 8/9/2023 at 8:51 PM, Randall Dowling said:

At first, I wasn't interested in this thread as I don't dwell overly much on nostalgia.  However, as I've read responses, I'm really impressed at hearing more about board members and their lives and memories.

I'm reminded of this quote from the first season finale of Mad Men by the title of this thread:

"Nostalgia - its delicate, but potent. Teddy told me that in Greek nostalgia literally means “the pain from an old wound.” It’s a twinge in your heart far more powerful than memory alone."

Perhaps it's this definition that makes me return to the present when I consider "better times" in my life when I was young.  I don't want to live in the past more than I exist in the present.  Because there are some pretty wonderful things about the time I live in now, I just have to remind myself of what those things are.

Having said all of this, my collection increasingly is really centered on either books that I really wanted as a kid, like this book:

And books that were really special that I bought and owned as a kid but sold over the years so I found new copies that have that fresh feeling I remember.  This is an example of that.

Last, there is the new territory of collecting that I've discovered for myself, not comics, but other very cool ephemera like non-comic magazines from the 30s-70s and paperbacks from the 50s-60s.  Both areas are undiscovered country to me and so the joy of exploration and research and education is back.  It's not that I know everything about comics (far from it), but at one time or another, I've collected most genres of comics so there aren't that many surprises anymore.  With these other books, I've spent hundreds of hours scouring the internet and found so many blogs and resources where wonderful examples abound.  The world is a much bigger place than it was before and, for me, that's a good thing.

Well said. The “thrill of discovery” never gets old.

[factory sealed]

On 8/8/2023 at 12:07 PM, Get Marwood & I said:

Same here. Never ate so much Weetabix. If I shut my eyes I can still smell the inside of the box. There was always that split second of despair that the cards might be missing. But they were always there. Just some pictures on a bit of cardboard they were. But nonetheless, magical.

See also, Super Heroes cards 

 

You should have a bowl of Weetabix now for old times sake  

Whenever asked what do you want for breakfast or lunch or dinner or snack??? Answer was always the same; toast or peanut butter and jelly. We would make triple decker sandwiches all in a strategic effort to blast through the bread quickly to ultimately say, hey we are out of bread, have to run to the store!! Sometimes if we went to the store at the right time in the morning, we would catch the vendor putting out all the new loaves. This gave maximum potential for acquiring the cards we wanted 

Also wanted to add, you made me think of something else in one of your other comments. When it came to comics, I always read them immediately and was not gentle with them at all. However interestingly enough there was something always mesmerizing by the old school toy stores when you walked in how the end caps and aisles were so neatly stacked with tons of carded figures and boxed accessories etc. right to the ceiling.

Especially in the early 80s as I got a little older and appreciative, I would actually not open my figures right away. I remember when I finally got a G1 Megatron; I actually left it in the box for over a week just to look at it and imagine what could be. When I came home from school, I would play this game with my friends where I was running a toy store and putting merchandise out etc. Same deal with MOTU; I would leave them sealed on bubble for days. I think the longest I ever waited was when I scored an imperial shuttle space ship that was on clearance. The box was absolutely gigantic and I left it sealed for nearly a month.

For trading cards; my uncle had a small grocery business downtown that was located right next to a very large wholesaler. You could not just buy a pack of something there; you had to buy a box or a case. If you bought a case, the savings vs. retail per pack cost was incredible! 

On a side note my uncle was one the greatest collectors I have ever known. So forward looking and brilliant. Never opened any wax packs for sports and nonsports cards; always left boxes sealed. Same thing with toys; he was crazy about toys and model kits. For comics he had this gig where he would go all over the territory and pickup all the unwanted/unsold comic books from merchants; this was before they started tearing off covers so all of this in addition to what he actually purchased, amassed into a gigantic collection from the 60s and 70s.

I think regardless of your current status in life or how balanced or not your day-to-day is, what you're doing career wise or maybe taking a trip somewhere; just in terms of the tangible actual feelings of excitement, anticipation etc. nothing comes close to those days when I would walk into that wholesaler and immediately get hit with overwhelming smell of tons of candy or I'd go to a toy store hoping to see the latest MOTU end caps and crossing fingers some G1 transformers might be around. Heck I remember walking into a K-Mart right after I saw Star Wars Episode IV and in the main aisled centered to the entrance were these giant fenced bins with tons and tons of the original 12 backs all for $1.99 each. I reached in and got a Stormtrooper and Luke Skywalker. 

 

Edited August 10, 2023 by factory sealed

[Get Marwood & I]

On 8/10/2023 at 4:25 PM, factory sealed said:

 

You should have a bowl of Weetabix now for old times sake  

Whenever asked what do you want for breakfast or lunch or dinner or snack??? Answer was always the same; toast or peanut butter and jelly. We would make triple decker sandwiches all in a strategic effort to blast through the bread quickly to ultimately say, hey we are out of bread, have to run to the store!! Sometimes if we went to the store at the right time in the morning, we would catch the vendor putting out all the new loaves. This gave maximum potential for acquiring the cards we wanted 

Also wanted to add, you made me think of something else in one of your other comments. When it came to comics, I always read them immediately and was not gentle with them at all. However interestingly enough there was something always mesmerizing by the old school toy stores when you walked in how the end caps and aisles were so neatly stacked with tons of carded figures and boxed accessories etc. right to the ceiling.

Especially in the early 80s as I got a little older and appreciative, I would actually not open my figures right away. I remember when I finally got a G1 Megatron; I actually left it in the box for over a week just to look at it and imagine what could be. When I came home from school, I would play this game with my friends where I was running a toy store and putting merchandise out etc. Same deal with MOTU; I would leave them sealed on bubble for days. I think the longest I ever waited was when I scored an imperial shuttle space ship that was on clearance. The box was absolutely gigantic and I left it sealed for nearly a month.

For trading cards; my uncle had a small grocery business downtown that was located right next to a very large wholesaler. You could not just buy a pack of something there; you had to buy a box or a case. If you bought a case, the savings vs. retail per pack cost was incredible! 

On a side note my uncle was one the greatest collectors I have ever known. So forward looking and brilliant. Never opened any wax packs for sports and nonsports cards; always left boxes sealed. Same thing with toys; he was crazy about toys and model kits. For comics he had this gig where he would go all over the territory and pickup all the unwanted/unsold comic books from merchants; this was before they started tearing off covers so all of this in addition to what he actually purchased, amassed into a gigantic collection from the 60s and 70s.

I think regardless of your current status in life or how balanced or not your day-to-day is, what you're doing career wise or maybe taking a trip somewhere; just in terms of the tangible actual feelings of excitement, anticipation etc. nothing comes close to those days when I would walk into that wholesaler and immediately get hit with overwhelming smell of tons of candy or I'd go to a toy store hoping to see the latest MOTU end caps and crossing fingers some G1 transformers might be around. Heck I remember walking into a K-Mart right after I saw Star Wars Episode IV and in the main aisled centered to the entrance were these giant fenced bins with tons and tons of the original 12 backs all for $1.99 each. I reached in and got a Stormtrooper and Luke Skywalker. 

 

I can still get excited by comics at 55, but nothing beats the excitement of youth when, lets face it, things mattered so much more. Once you've experienced a bit of adult life, the death of loved ones, the realisation that your body isn't invincible after all and all the other slings and arrows that life throws at you it's hard to match the excitement you felt as a kid for the things you followed and collected. I won't tell the stories again, but there are a handful of memories that are burned so strongly into my mind - memories involving the discovery of certain things - that I can still smell if I shut my eyes, 40 or so years later. Sheer, unadulterated excitement. Comics and music are two things that still come close - they can still transport you there and I wouldn't be without either. 

[factory sealed]

On 8/9/2023 at 3:47 PM, Ken Aldred said:

I agree. That’s the healthy, pure side of the nostalgia spectrum.

That's a great point.

Succinctly put for me, nostalgia is a very strong yearning to go back to a place or time that you never can again. These comic books, toys, cards, etc. are archived artifacts and it's that ultra deep connection we have with them from the past that gives us this time machine like effect i.e. in other words it's just not a random memory, rather it's much much stronger and more potent of an experience than that. 

[factory sealed]

On 8/9/2023 at 6:13 AM, Ken Aldred said:

I always think of this Twilight Zone episode, about the malleability and fallibility of human memory, and the pitfalls…

Horace Ford is a 38-year-old toy designer whose life is dominated by blissfully happy memories of his childhood. His colleagues, wife, and mother have all become increasingly frustrated with his obsession.

One day, he decides to revisit his childhood neighborhood. Ford discovers, to his amazement, that it has not changed. He recognizes the boys he played with in his childhood—who have not aged. Frightened, he returns to his apartment, but he visits his old neighborhood again on each of the next several nights. Each night the same scene plays out and he stays slightly longer, before returning to his apartment.

On his last visit, he hears his old friends complaining that he did not invite them to his birthday party. He tries to talk to them, and suddenly turns into a boy again. His friends bully and assault him, as Horace realizes that his childhood was not as pleasant as he would nostalgically recall. After his wife finds him, he "grows up"—returning to his own time period and age group with a new-found appreciation for life as an adult.

 

[valiantman]

Nostalgia for me is "re-feeling" something that I felt so many years ago, not pain... but possibility.

I collected baseball cards before I got into comics, so I get that nostalgic feeling when I see a card that I wanted but never owned. It doesn't need to be an important card because I was a kid. I wasn't going to own a Mickey Mantle rookie card, but there was a chance I might own a 1984 Donruss Don Mattingly or a 1986 Donruss Jose Canseco when I started collecting in 1988. They were out of my price range, but it always felt possible that I could trade for one or find one somehow. The "feeling" of excitement seeing those cards at card shows, in card shops, or even in price guides was real even if I didn't have one of my own. I still "re-feel" that excitement for those cards, even though I have a small stack of both cards.

The same is true for comic books. I never saw a copy of Harbinger #1 (1992) in person until I bought one from eBay sometime around 1997. I collected comics for several years, including focusing on Valiant books, but I never saw a copy of Harbinger #1 at a shop or at a comic show. There was always a "feeling" that I would own one some day, and now I own several, but I "re-feel" the excitement when I look through my collection or see a copy for sale "in the wild". There was a combination of desire and possibility for those collectibles which were reasonably obtainable in the future (but just out of reach at the time) that is very different from just wishing I could own an Action #1 but not "feeling" that I ever will.

Edited August 10, 2023 by valiantman

[CJ Design]

On 8/7/2023 at 2:10 AM, Get Marwood & I said:

This post resonates strongly with me. I don't have kids in my life so have largely missed out on the connection to the current that they bring. I remember when I was a kid, the whole family watched Top of The Pops, so my Mum and Dad knew all the new stuff. There isn't much like that nowadays that I can see and even if there was, I have no youngsters to bring it into my world..

I find myself very much stuck in the past. All the things I like, have loved, and still love seem to be of the past. They say that every successive generation feels this way but I do think that the era of my youth was the best time the human race will ever see. It was far from perfect, but the post war, pre-internet era had the best of everything. It was people doing everything, not machines. There was variety, experimentation, self expression, risk taking and danger. There was gentleness, the quiet and the paired down. There was the possibility of things to come, fresh, exciting and never before seen. Today I feel that everything 'new' is just an old thing in disguise. You have to feel a little sorry for the gifted, enthusiastic youth of today. What can they come up with that hasn't already been done?

Comics are the reason we are here on this forum and comics are of the past. They exist still today, clinging on for dear life, and there are youngsters in the hobby. But comics - real comics - are of an era that is gone. I could go on for hours about this, and have done in other posts, but I've come to accept that all my hobbies, all my interests, largely exist in the past. It doesn't actually bother me anymore as it once did. As long as I can go and see Morrissey, Costello, Squeeze and David Devant still, pop along to the London Comic Fair and nab things that I've enjoyed in my days from eBay, I'm happy enough. The present is vastly over rated and I don't much fancy it on most days if I'm honest.

Thanks for posting @factory sealed

This....

[D2]

On 8/9/2023 at 7:59 PM, lizards2 said:

You cannot have a balanced attack until you can balance a tack-hammer on your head.

Sadly my circus act was always focused around lion taming. 

[lizards2]

On 8/10/2023 at 10:54 AM, D2 said:

Sadly my circus act was always focused around lion taming. 

and the tigers didn't like being ignored?

[valiantman]

On 8/9/2023 at 6:59 PM, lizards2 said:

You cannot have a balanced attack until you can balance a tack-hammer on your head.

If you learn to balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack.

 

 

... also, something about watermelon on your feet. Maybe.

[lizards2]

On 8/10/2023 at 6:03 PM, valiantman said:

If you learn to balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack.

 

 

... also, something about watermelon on your feet. Maybe.

So many good things about that movie. 

[D2]

On 8/10/2023 at 9:07 PM, lizards2 said:

So many good things about that movie. 

Aw, I missed the reference. 
 

[lizards2]

On 8/10/2023 at 6:33 PM, D2 said:

On 8/10/2023 at 6:07 PM, lizards2 said:

So many good things about that movie. 

Aw, I missed the reference. 
 

 

Mystery Men