The Button Humpty Dance
All right!
Stop whatcha doin'
'cause I'm about to ruin
the image and the style that ya used to.
I sell comics
but yo I'm makin' money see
so yo world I hope you're ready for me.
Now gather round
I'm the new fool in town
and my sound's laid down by the Underground.
I drink up all the Hater-Ade ya got on ya shelf
so just let me introduce myself
My name is Button Humpty, pronounced with a Umpty.
Yo button, oh how I like to hump thee.
And all the boardies in the top ten--please allow me to bump thee.
I'm steppin' tall, y'all,
and just like Humpty Dumpty
you're gonna fall when the moderators pump me.
I like to buy and sell,
My basement home's funky,
I'm spunky. I like my oatmeal lumpy.
I'm sick wit dis, straight gangsta mack
but sometimes I get ridiculous
I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice
hey yo cosplayer, c'mere--are ya ticklish?
Yeah, I called ya that.
Look at me, I collect comics
It never stopped me from causin' drama
I'm a freak
I like Verotik comics with the boom
I once got busy in a Wizard World bathroom
I'm crazy.
Allow me to amaze thee.
They say I'm ugly but it just don't faze me.
I'm still gettin' other dudes' strikes
and I even got my own Mike
The Button Humpty Dance is your chance to do the hump
Do the Button Hump, come on and do the Button Hump
Do the Button Hump, just watch me do the Button Hump
Do ya know what I'm doin', doin' the Button Hump
Do the Button Hump, do the Button Hump
Verse Two:
People say "Yo, Humpty, you're really quite striking'"
When I'm button humping posts that I'm not liking
Ya stare, ya glare, ya constantly try to compare me
but ya can't get near me
I give 'em more, see, and on the floor, B,
all the mods they adore me
Oh yes, boardies, I'm really bein' sincere
'cause in a vicious cockfight my button hump is quite clear.
My button hump is fierce, uh-uh I'm quite proud
Cause when I'm button humpin', my complaints are quite loud
I get assuaged by the mods, ya know I'm in charge,
both how I'm livin' and my board persona is large
My collecting focus is narrow, I fire off posts like Green Arrow,
And try and rock an argument like Clarence Darrow
All ya had to do was give Button Humpty a chance
and now I'm gonna do my dance.
{Chorus}
Class of 2003, do the Button Hump, do the Button Hump
Class of 2005, do the Button Hump, do the Button Hump
Class of 2007, do the Button Hump, just keep on doin' the hump
All the newbsauce, do the Button Hump, do the Button Hump
Let's get stoopid!
{Chorus}
Oh, yeah, come on and break it down
Outro:
Once again, the Button Humpty is in the house
I'd like to send a shout out to the whole world,
keep on doin' the Button Humpty Dance,
and to the ladies,
peace and button humptiness forever
{Music and fade}