Crisis On Infinite Message Boards 6 6

[Joanna]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

[greggy]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

 

Shaddup or I'll troll you!

[Illiterati-migration]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

 

Shaddup or I'll troll you!

 

What, you'll live under a bridge, eat little goats, and scare children with your glottal utterances?

 

Don't you do that anyway?

[greggy]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

 

Shaddup or I'll troll you!

 

What, you'll live under a bridge, eat little goats, and scare children with your glottal utterances?

 

Don't you do that anyway?

 

Yeah...but WTF will you do if and when you "graduate"?

[BachelorOfComix]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

You happen to have a Wonder Woman troll? That would be appropriate for the gregster.

[Illiterati-migration]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

 

Shaddup or I'll troll you!

 

What, you'll live under a bridge, eat little goats, and scare children with your glottal utterances?

 

Don't you do that anyway?

 

Yeah...but WTF will you do if and when you "graduate"?

 

Then I'll be able to sit here all day and mock you until you cry, Bridge Dweller!

[greggy]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

 

Shaddup or I'll troll you!

 

What, you'll live under a bridge, eat little goats, and scare children with your glottal utterances?

 

Don't you do that anyway?

 

Yeah...but WTF will you do if and when you "graduate"?

 

Then I'll be able to sit here all day and mock you until you cry, Bridge Dweller!

[Illiterati-migration]

BoC, on a comics board, it's far more appropriate to use a Batman Troll:

 

 

I thought I was pretty cool having my own Batman troll as a kid.

 

Shaddup or I'll troll you!

 

What, you'll live under a bridge, eat little goats, and scare children with your glottal utterances?

 

Don't you do that anyway?

 

Yeah...but WTF will you do if and when you "graduate"?

 

Then I'll be able to sit here all day and mock you until you cry, Bridge Dweller!

 

NOW STOP RUINING THIS THREAD!

[BigMan]

After all, Big Man has to find out what it's like to be an inch tall.

 

-- Joanna

Well he's halfway there 'cause he already has a 1 inch.........

 

...advantage over you?

Wow Joanna had my back on that one. Thanks

 

By the way can't wait for the continued tale of the Mighty Runt.. .

[NewtSamson]

I was the first person to die during the crisis (read the first couple posts on page 1).....and like any good comicbook superhero, I'm back from the dead with a more modern spin.

I'm DISCO DANCIN' NEWTSAMSON, here to fight crime while I shake it on the dance floor like John Travolta.

[THE_BEYONDER]

I was the first person to die during the crisis (read the first couple posts on page 1).....and like any good comicbook superhero, I'm back from the dead with a more modern spin.

I'm DISCO DANCIN' NEWTSAMSON, here to fight crime while I shake it on the dance floor like John Travolta.

 

I'm thinking more like...DISCO STEW

[NewtSamson]

 

I'm thinking more like...DISCO STEW

 

What kind of meat is in "Disco Stew"? Any cottage cheese in there?

I'm thinking more on the lines of...Disco Stu.

 

 

[THE_BEYONDER]

 

I'm thinking more like...DISCO STEW

 

What kind of meat is in "Disco Stew"? Any cottage cheese in there?

I'm thinking more on the lines of...Disco Stu.

 

 

D'oh!

[chrisco37]

This thread has slipped too far......BUMP!

 

C'mon Joanna, you can't pull a Frank Miller on us......

 

Chris

[Joanna]

This thread has slipped too far......BUMP!

 

C'mon Joanna, you can't pull a Frank Miller on us......

 

Chris

 

You wait a full month between new issues of a comic, but you can't wait a few more days on this puppy?

 

Okay, that's actually rather sweet.

 

I have a deadline looming on a major project and absolutely, positively, have to finish it. I had two due at the same time, and project 1 is done and handed in. But project 2 (by far the more demanding and complex) still needs a bit of work. I've been sick all week with food poisoning and a bad reaction to a new blood pressure medication. I haven't even posted any new auctions since last Sunday! Today is the first day I've felt like a human being again, so I'm going to work like crazy on Project 2 today. (Holiday? What holiday?)

 

 

The deadline is Wednesday, but I hope to finish Project 2 earlier than that. When it is finished and handed in to my editor, I can begin work on Project 3, which I can work on while also writing Crisis. So no worries!

 

-- Joanna

[chrisco37]

I was just messing w/ you Joanna. I remember you saying you had deadlines to meet. Although, I can't imagine what could be more important than your "Den Mother" duties here.

 

Thread just needed bumped. Take your time. I know it'll be worth the wait!!!

 

Chris

[Joanna]

Issue 10: Brawling and Bawling

 

There is pandemonium in the water cooler. The bubbling, black nothingness has eaten the Land of Coinee and all its inhabitants. The comic forums are gone. Only the Water Cooler is left. Heroes and villains face off in various threads, ready to rip each other to pieces.

 

The JBH and The N'Superables align themselves against Coinee, Dr. Gloom, and Lord Rawl. The Hero Squadron, with The Brick, Flame War and Where'd He Go, face off against The Bad Brigade. And because there aren't enough villains, The Solar Powers confront The Hostess Hoarde.

 

Far above the fracas, The Archi-Moderator, Gemma-Mint, and Dena-Myte watch the action unfold, while cackling evilly and snacking on Mountain Dew and Trail Mix -- the kind with the M&Ms in it, so it's less about health and more about the fact that the commissary ran out of frozen Snickers bars.

 

The JBH & N'Superables vs. Coinee, Dr. Gloom, and Lord Rawl

 

"I say we scare 'em by setting up a PA system and reading Atom Age horror books in a really spooky voice on the loudspeaker," says Spelling Bee.

 

"That might work..." says Rerun, thinking it wouldn't work.

 

"Ignore the Bee, Rerun," says Lighthouse. "That's always his plan. It hasn't got a chance in hell."

 

Bee finishes setting up a PA system and tests the mike. "Testing, testing, 1, 2, 3, sibilance, sibilance, we've got a great big convoy rolling through the night! Hey good-looking, what you got cooking?"

 

"I surrender!" trumpets Supafreak. "I cannot take that frogging singing any more!"

 

"Hmm... maybe it would work," mumbles Lighthouse.

 

Just then, Coinee, Dr. Gloom and Lord Rawl round the corner.

 

"Oh look! Justa Buncha Lamers and the N'Sufferables!" says Coinee.

 

"Score one bagging for our side," says Lord Rawl.

 

"'. That's not a bagging. Ever since you got metal-plated, you've lost your touch. You're barely even a troll at this point," says Mylite.

 

"Turd!"

 

"," says Mylite.

 

""

 

""

 

""

 

""

 

"Who's winning?" whispers RTF.

 

"It's difficult to pick a winner so soon," says Emoticon, "but both are using their weapons masterfully. This is an incredible duo-bagging, the likes of which we may never see again."

 

"Oh for corn's sake, stop it, both of you!" shouts Lord Rawl. He uses his mighty mental abilities, forcing Mylite and Coinee to do a tango.

 

" ," says Emoticon.

 

"That gives me an idea..." says Donut, whispering in Lighthouse's ear.

 

House slips out of Donut's hole and sneaks away to a big and tall shop on the corner.

 

RTF, frustrated with the lameness of the battle, squirts Lord Rawl with goo. Rawl leaps into the air with a girlish scream. Coinee and Mylite stop dancing and retreat to their own sides, winded.

 

Dr. Gloom makes a piano and a safe fall from a 20 story window, aimed right at Raspberry Toaster Pastry. Supafreak sees it, trumpets, and pushes RTP aside. The safe lands on his head, killing him instantly.

 

Both heroes and villains stand around for a bit, not sure what to do. "Dang, I didn't know anyone was going to get killed," mumbles Bee.

 

"I fear the reprisals and think I will leave this battle for several months, returning only when it's obvious you need my enormous brain to help you live your lives," says Dr. Gloom, high-tailing it off the battlefield.

 

Coinee begins laughing. "Loser!" he shouts, pointing at the dead mammoth.

 

"That's not nice," says Alias. "He was our friend."

 

"Friend of a loser!"

 

Anger builds in the N'Superables, but they are reminded of their loss when Rerun plays a test pattern with a musical track of the Star Spangled Banner. "He'll pay for this," says Alias.

 

"We have to do something!" says RTP. "We have to avenge his death!"

 

"And KostumeKween's!" adds Mylite.

 

"What are you going to do, ya bunch of Nancys? I'm invulnerable! You can't hurt me!"

 

"Someone poke him in the eye!" shouts Bee.

 

Coinee closes his eyes and mouth, leaving nothing but solid fused-coin invulnerability.

 

Suddenly, a man in a trenchcoat and fedora approaches Coinee. In his hat is a card that says 'Press'. "Newt Samson, foreign correspondent. May I ask you some questions about the battle, Mr. Coinee?"

 

Coinee shakes his head 'no', fearing it's a trick to get him to open his vulnerable, over-sized mouth.

 

"It's not a good time," says Lord Rawl.

 

"What paper are you from?" asks Lighthouse, back from his errand.

 

"What paper? Why, The Hindu! It's India's largest news source."

 

Coinee's eyes snap open and he begins to guffaw uncontrollably.

 

"What's so funny?" asks Newt.

 

Coinee answers only with more laughter.

 

"Now" shouts Donut.

 

Quickly, Alias splits into 12 people and surrounds Lord Rawl, each of his different selves thinking of Stan Lee dialogue to daze and confuse the mind-reader. Rerun turns up his TV, further confusing the mind-controller with an episode of 'Saved By the Bell'.

 

Bee leaps into Donut's hole backwards. Lighthouse blinds Coinee with his high beams. Donut flies like a bullet toward the silver-plated villain, aiming Bee's lethal stinger for the enormous laughing mouth.

 

Unable to bear the torture, Lord Rawl runs screaming from Alias and Rerun.

 

"The Hindu! ," continues Coinee. With a final burst of speed, Donute plants Bee's stinging butt directly in Coinee's laughing mouth. The villain dies instantly.

 

There is a moment of quiet and then pandemonium breaks out as the crowds cheer for the triumphant heroes. They high five each other, having experienced their very first vanquishing.

 

"That all you wanted me to do, House?" asks Newt.

 

"That was plenty, buddy. Have a cup of joe on me," he says, giving him a sawbuck. Newt walks back toward the Big and Tall shop to return the coat and hat, while the heroes come down from their high at the sight of a large, dead woolly mammoth blocking the street.

 

"He gave his life to save mine," says RTP.

 

"He will be avenged," says Emoticon, streams of tears flying sideways out of both of his eyes.

 

To be continued...

 

[Joanna]

For those keeping track:

 

The JBH (Justa Buncha Heroes)

 

Flying Donut (Flying Donut) Flight

Lighthouse (Lighthouse) eye beams

Spelling Bee (PovertyRow) flight, stinger

Raspberry Toaster Pastry (Darthdeisel) flight, goo

KostumeKween (MajorKhaos) deceased

 

The Solar Powers

 

Mercury (Dam60) flight, heat, speed

Venus (CosmicBob) flight, love

Earth (Ubiquiti) flight, power over dirt

Mars (Mushroom) flight, warrior skills

Uranus (Old Guy) flight, noxious scent

Saturn (Odin) flight, energy rings

Jupiter (BronzeBruce) flight, gas

Neptune (Zonker) flight, water

Pluto (hkp) flight, ice

 

The N'Superables

 

Emoticon (BachelorOfComix) can be any emoticon

Rerun (Araich) TV in belly

Supafreak deceased (Supapimp) woolly mammoth

Alias (Bonds) can split into 12

Mylite (greggy) slabbed, irresistible

(honorary member)

 

The Hostess Hoard

 

Twinkie (Hogations) goo

Snowball (The Beyonder) goo

Ding Dong (Aman) goo

Ho Ho (Ninanina) goo

Fruit Pie (JLA All the Way) goo

Cupcake (Doyle) goo

Susie Q (Andrew Knight) goo

 

Unaffiliated as yet

 

The Brick (Crisco) invulnerable

Flame War (Fantastic Four) Flame power

Where'd He Go (Clobberintime) invisibility

Den Mothersaur (Joanna) can be a monster

Trimmer deceased (no one in particular) aerobic weight loss

 

 

The Villains

 

The Archi-Moderator (Architect) all powerful

Dena-Myte (Dena) semi-all powerful

Gemma-Mint (Gemma) semi-all powerful

Coinee deceased (Bugaboo) nearly invulnerable

Dr. Gloom (Joe Collector) makes things crash

Lord Rawl (Lord Rahl) balloon animals

The Mods (CGCmod, CGCmod2,

NGCmod, SGCmod)

deceased

 

The Hero Squadron

 

Sgt. Rocky (Awe4one) Super strength

Damp Dude (Elvis) Aqua powers

Magic Tape (Scottish) stickiness

Go Go (Speedjunkies) Superspeed

Zilla (Zillatoy) Ninja dinosaur

Ape (CD4ever) Shape shifter

Chrome Dome (Chromium) power over metal

Toast deceased (DanDrista) none

 

 

The Bad Brigade

 

Negative Lad (Murpho) can affect self-esteem

Larry Von Dork (Werner Von Doom) evil scientist

Fission (Rob_React) Atomic powers

Pyro (Blazingbob) Pyro powers

Ki-Zar (Comicwiz) Killer lizard

Origami (Kevthemev) power over paper

Runt (BigMan) Shrinking power

Squatter (Lantern) knee laser beams

 

 

 

[chrisco37]

Joanna,

 

You rock! I knew it'd be worth the wait!!!!!!

 

Chris

[Joanna]

Joanna,

 

You rock! I knew it'd be worth the wait!!!!!!

 

Chris

 

Got my projects finished and handed in, baby, so I'm free to goof off a little now.

 

Yeeha!

 

-- Joanna