General discussion thread - keep the other threads clean 29 29

[RockMyAmadeus]

 

Really, my only question here is what will it take, how long will it be, before most people make a concerted effort to stop judging by the appearance, by what people say, by the sad stories, the sympathy plays, the "your heart is in the right place" and start judging based on what they actually do?

 

We get angry...and rightfully so!...when someone comes and walks away with our money and never ships the item. But, we, collectively, let slide soooooo much when it comes to people who are pulling the long con....they say the "right" things, do the "right" things, play all the "right" emotional chords...and people invariably fall for it all, and worse, get angry at those saying "hey, wait a minute...something's not adding up, here."

 

No one is above scrutiny. No one. Me, you, no one. And no one is immune to feeling sympathy for people in a rough patch. But there is nothing wrong with trusting, but verifying. Someone starts asking for money, they ought to be willing to come clean about what they're doing with it in the first place. If you want to keep your secrets, fine, but don't go asking for help if you won't be honest AND open about where you really are.

 

Cynical? No, realistic. Wouldn't have it any other way.

 

[Chip Cataldo]

Hello everyone,

 

All the other threads were locked so I'm responding here.

 

First off I'd like to address the Google links that were thrown up about my time on previous forums. Yes, I've had some issues in the past. However, if you would kindly look here :

http://boards.collectors-society.com/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=5525613#Post5525613

http://feedback.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewFeedback2&userid=chips-comics&ftab=AllFeedback

...you would see that I don't have those issues anymore and complete transactions to satisfaction. I'm not 100% perfect, but no one is...especially with a large sample size. Those other situations were years ago and I take a lot more care & give a lot more attention when selling online. I don't believe I've ever had even a small issue when selling on this forum.

 

Secondly I'd like to admit that I made a huge mistake in not analyzing and correcting my goal once I decided to remove the Paypal loan repayment from my plan. I took the advice of a few that said it's not really something I should be asking for and I should only ask for help with my living expenses and related things. I just left the amount as-is because I didn't yet have a job and was worried about my bills continuing to pile up. Hiring movers should definitely not have been included but I wasn't thinking about just leaving things behind and taking a monetary loss. I didn't want to take any kind of loss...I was trying to gain ground, not lose it. I'm guilty of not taking the amount as seriously as I should and naively thought that it wouldn't be an issue. I honestly didn't even think I'd come anywhere close to even a third of that so I am guilty of not paying it the attention I should. I was wrong and should have made it a more accurate number before going public.

 

If anyone wants to know exactly what areas I've spent the actual donations on I'm going to list them here. I don't think I've forgotten anything. However, I have sold some items of my own on the forum while the fundraiser was going on so the numbers might not match up 100%...nearly all of it is here. I also received donations from friends on Facebook & sold some things locally so not all the money raised for these bills came from this forum. All of it was to make overdue things as current as possible and I didn't have enough left for a security deposit/1st month rent at a new & cheaper place.

 

Monthly rent - $2,940 (2 months)

Car payment - $577.20 (3 months)

Utilities (heat/electric) - $298.39 (3 months)

Phone - $210.66 (2 months)

 

For those that still care I do have some good news on the 2nd interview I had the other day. I got the job and started training yesterday. I'm happy about it because it wasn't a job I expected to land (with 3 weeks between interviews). It's paid training so while I do have to wait a few weeks to see money coming in I will eventually have positive cash flow and am making it a priority to get into a cheaper home as soon as possible.

 

I know I'm probably forgetting to address something so I'm sorry for that but it's early and I haven't slept much due to the usual nerves about the new job.

 

I want to thank everyone for their help & good advice and once again apologize for the way I handled the situation. I obviously wasn't thinking it through clearly when I started this entire thing, you (all) were right to ask questions and it got very much out of hand with every subsequent thing I said.

 

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

 

Regards,

 

Chip

Edited June 2, 2016 by Chip Cataldo

[Chaseman210]

Congrats on the job, Chip! I hope everything starts looking up for you!

[Chip Cataldo]

Congrats on the job, Chip! I hope everything starts looking up for you!

Thank you. I appreciate you saying that. The best thing about the job is that the more I work, the more I earn. I'm going to hit the ground running and get as many hours in as I can. I just have to make sure I know the product, but that will come with time. The company is doing very well so I know I can make this work.

 

http://www.filterqueen.com

Edited June 2, 2016 by Chip Cataldo

[Ryan.]

For those that still care I do have some good news on the 2nd interview I had the other day. I got the job and started training yesterday.

 

Great news, Chip. Sincerely.

[jaybuck43]

Chip, I'm happy that you got a job, that's great. But I'm also going to be the wet blanket (apologies). Your post about how the donations were used is exactly what people who were hesitant about you running a charity thread were worried about. Fine, use the funds to get car and phone current, cause you'll need those two things. But that still leaves about $3300. Use that money to move into a cheaper place and then call up your landlord and offer him whatever you can to get "good" on back rent. But it's more important to set you up for future success, by getting out of that expensive apartment that you don't need, then to pay back bills that will still be there next month. I know cahoakie offered to help with how to pay off your debts, take him up on it. It's a very generous offer.

[vaillant]

Chip, I'm happy that you got a job, that's great. But I'm also going to be the wet blanket (apologies). Your post about how the donations were used is exactly what people who were hesitant about you running a charity thread were worried about. Fine, use the funds to get car and phone current, cause you'll need those two things. But that still leaves about $3300. Use that money to move into a cheaper place and then call up your landlord and offer him whatever you can to get "good" on back rent. But it's more important to set you up for future success, by getting out of that expensive apartment that you don't need, then to pay back bills that will still be there next month. I know cahoakie offered to help with how to pay off your debts, take him up on it. It's a very generous offer.

 

Right, Chip you just have to be sincere, and develop a change of attitude.

There is no shame at all if one needs help, what was offputting to most was the partial lack of sincerity.

I believe as long as you strive to be utmost sincere, you’ll also see what went wrong in the past (and why). All the best.

[Chip Cataldo]

Chip, I'm happy that you got a job, that's great. But I'm also going to be the wet blanket (apologies). Your post about how the donations were used is exactly what people who were hesitant about you running a charity thread were worried about. Fine, use the funds to get car and phone current, cause you'll need those two things. But that still leaves about $3300. Use that money to move into a cheaper place and then call up your landlord and offer him whatever you can to get "good" on back rent. But it's more important to set you up for future success, by getting out of that expensive apartment that you don't need, then to pay back bills that will still be there next month. I know cahoakie offered to help with how to pay off your debts, take him up on it. It's a very generous offer.

Thanks Jay. I appreciate the advice. There's not much I can do about things now except to work hard and get the cash to move into a smaller place next month as everything I listed was already paid. My landlord isn't the type of person who would "work with me" on anything, anyway. I had to beg him to not evict me when I fell behind as it is. I will contact CAhokie once things settle in to the new job.

[Chip Cataldo]

Right, Chip you just have to be sincere, and develop a change of attitude.

There is no shame at all if one needs help, what was offputting to most was the partial lack of sincerity.

I believe as long as you strive to be utmost sincere, you’ll also see what went wrong in the past (and why). All the best.

Thank you Claudio. Yes, I realize I made a mistake there. I appreciate your support.

[ChasingKingKirby]

Congrats Chip! I hope this is the start of something good for you.

[CAHokie]

Chip, The offer still stands. It can be done with general information only and no personal information needs to be shared. It will look something similar to this.

 

Credit Card-1 Amount Owed $10,000 (interest rate 10%) Monthly payment $300

Credit Card-2 XXXXXXX (Fill in numbers)

Car Loan XXXXXXX (Fill in numbers)

Furniture Loan XXXXXXX

 

 

 

They will be put in a certain order based on a few factors and then the goal will be to pay off each loan one at a time and as each one is paid off, the extra money will be placed on the next loan in line to pay it off and so on. There are a few other things that need to be worked on such as having a small emergency fund ($1,000 or so to start) but one step at a time.

[Chip Cataldo]

Congrats Chip! I hope this is the start of something good for you.

Thank you, I appreciate that.

[Chip Cataldo]

Chip, The offer still stands. It can be done with general information only and no personal information needs to be shared. It will look something similar to this.

 

Credit Card-1 Amount Owed $10,000 (interest rate 10%) Monthly payment $300

Credit Card-2 XXXXXXX (Fill in numbers)

Car Loan XXXXXXX (Fill in numbers)

Furniture Loan XXXXXXX

 

 

 

They will be put in a certain order based on a few factors and then the goal will be to pay off each loan one at a time and as each one is paid off, the extra money will be placed on the next loan in line to pay it off and so on. There are a few other things that need to be worked on such as having a small emergency fund ($1,000 or so to start) but one step at a time.

Thank you. I understand the concept. I did bookmark that "What's the Cost?" website that someone linked, but I will work with you. Give me a bit to compile that information...there's quite a bit but I do have everything organized paperwork-wise. I appreciate the help.

Edited June 2, 2016 by Chip Cataldo

[HarveySwick]

Congrats on the job, Chip.

 

But I don't want to just leave it with a quick and call it case closed. You have obviously dealt with similar issues in the past and burned bridges while cheating people out of money. And you once again find yourself in this self-made predicament of financial peril and have played the "victim card." This isn't something that happened over night; you were making comments about being lazy and lacking any motivation years back. You can't be surprised of where you ended up both financially and relationship wise. And short term donation and bail out is just a bandaid on the situation. I agree with what Branget and others have said: hitting rock bottom might have actually been a good thing long term for you. It looks like that's not going to happen though because people here have illustrated that they care about you. Don't return that kindness with a slap to their faces by just sweeping this under the rug and moving on. Chip, you need to see a therapist as there is obviously a deeper issue at play. Im not saying that to be a , but it's easy to see. Otherwise, if you don't hit rock bottom where you're forced to deal with things or don't voluntarily address the deeper rooted issues, you're never going to get ahead in life and will just experience similar issues in the future.

 

Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

[MetalPSI]

Chip,

 

Congrats on finding a job.

 

I've apologized for jumping the gun on nominating you for PL/HOS. The only reason I am actually posting here, to you, is because I was pretty vocal in the other thread.

 

Your past behavior is abhorrent. I am not someone without reflection, and wish you best on learning what you can.

 

Here's hoping with passing time you make me look like the biggest jerk.

[Chip Cataldo]

Congrats on the job, Chip.

 

But I don't want to just leave it with a quick and call it case closed. You have obviously dealt with similar issues in the past and burned bridges while cheating people out of money. And you once again find yourself in this self-made predicament of financial peril and have played the "victim card." This isn't something that happened over night; you were making comments about being lazy and lacking and motivation years back. You can't be surprised of where you ended up both financially and relationship wise. And short term donation and bail out is just a bandaid on the situation. I agree with what Branget and others have said: hitting rock bottom might have actually been a good thing long term for you. It looks like that's not going to happen though because people here have illustrated that they care about you. Don't return that kindness with a slap to their faces by just sweeping this under the rug and moving on. Chip, you need to see a therapist as there is obviously a deeper issue at play. Im not saying that to be a , but it's easy to see. Otherwise, if you don't hit rock bottom where you're forced to deal with things or don't voluntarily address the deeper rooted issues, you're never going to get ahead in life and will just experience similar issues in the future.

 

Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

Thank you for your advice. I will try my best to justify the faith that others have in me.

[Chip Cataldo]

Chip,

 

Congrats on finding a job.

 

I've apologized for jumping the gun on nominating you for PL/HOS. The only reason I am actually posting here, to you, is because I was pretty vocal in the other thread.

 

Your past behavior is abhorrent. I am not someone without reflection, and wish you best on learning what you can.

 

Here's hoping with passing time you make me look like the biggest jerk.

Thank you for posting that. Here's hoping *no one* looks like a jerk.

Edited June 2, 2016 by Chip Cataldo

[Jeffro.]

Congrats on the job.

 

However, those links detailing years of repeated issues on other sites and venues is very telling. Not isolated incidents. This is a pattern. You lost a lot of trust on these boards.

[N/A]

Chip,

 

Congrats on finding a job.

 

I've apologized for jumping the gun on nominating you for PL/HOS. The only reason I am actually posting here, to you, is because I was pretty vocal in the other thread.

 

Your past behavior is abhorrent. I am not someone without reflection, and wish you best on learning what you can.

 

Here's hoping with passing time you make me look like the biggest jerk.

Thank you for posting that. Here's hoping *no one* looks like a jerk.

 

I hope you have crossed "asking for handouts" off your list of possible income.

[N/A]

If someone starts a vote I would have no issue voting yes for the HOS.