Comic collectors who have had serious, hobby-related friction with a significant other, how did it resolve? 2 2

[Robot Man]

2 hours ago, wisbyron said:

I remember going to NYCC a few years ago and they had a Speed-Dating thing for comic fans and I thought that was a great idea and concept for people into comics etc. finding people with similar interests. Try to find something like this Namtak! 

Kind of hard to find one when they ask what you collect and you reply “Horror, Crime and anything with a chick chained to a wheel”...

[kav]

2 minutes ago, Robot Man said:

Kind of hard to find one when they ask what you collect and you reply “Horror, Crime and anything with a chick chained to a wheel”...

"My favorite book is the one where a hot poker is heading for eyeball-but it would be more valuable if it was woman's eye-"

"Yeah gotta go now bye!"

[Robot Man]

6 hours ago, Randall Ries said:

Oh man. Nothing sexier than a woman who deals in antiques. That's like having access to a private eye. Has she ever spotted comics for you? Funny thing is in most antique shops, comics aren't considered antiques per se. I have seen very very few comics in any antique shop I have visited. Paper can be considered antique, like old WWII posters or advertising cardboard, but not comics so much.

We have been married a long time. She is still way sexy to me. She knows how to doll it up and yet has no problem digging in and getting dirty to get what she wants. Unlike like me she pays up and deals in the high end pool (Tiffinany Lamps, Paintings, Jewelry and art pottery). She has cleaned out old vermin infested houses and buildings. 

She runs into a lot of stuff in her searches. She has found me old advertising signs, toys, sports items as well as comics and pulps). 

Problem is she is strictly a dealer and everything is for sale. Catch and release. She can’t understand why I want to keep everything...

[DavidTheDavid]

1 hour ago, Lurker89 said:

Rofl, my problem is I'm 32 and already in the same boat as you gents.

Married with kids etc. etc. 

Some days I see it as a problem other days I just think I was liberated early... Depressing and enlightening all at once....

Comic buying of big books ($500+) is always a negotiation ... I negotiate for a living so I guess it works out but I have still missed some big books because I've negotiated to buy other books come bonus time and then books I NEED are no longer in the budget. I've managed to get my WBN 32, HOS 92, Warrior Mag , and IM 55 along with many others . But have effectively missed out on MS 5, ASM 129, SS3 along with many others.

 

I had my first and only kid two months before I turned 42. No way I'd recommend that. Definitely wish I'd had him sooner. Everything would be easier if we'd done that. At this point in my life, now 49, I want my limited time and energy back, not to mention money. At my current age, my parents had my sister and me in college. I'll be 60 when mine goes to college. Way better to start earlier.

Edited April 23, 2021 by DavidTheDavid

[Randall Ries]

46 minutes ago, Lurker89 said:

Some days I see it as a problem other days I just think I was liberated early... Depressing and enlightening all at once....

Comic buying of big books ($500+) is always a negotiation ...

 

I felt like I had just been set free from prison. It happened virtually overnight as well. Or at least it seemed like it. Just suddenly realized "Hey! It's...it's...it's GONE! OH, LAWDY HAVE MERCY IT'S GONE!" I heard a Baptist choir somewhere chanting softly "Hallelujah....Hallelujah.....Hallelujah...."

Sometimes, some feminazi will get in my grill and tell me I'll "never know how a woman feels". I answer proudly and loudly "Oh yes I DO! I know how it feels to go 8 weeks without giving snu-snu one SECOND of thought!" LOL!

I have negotiated books as well. Haven't won them all. Big purchases have to be talked about. There can BE no $5,000 surprises at the end of the month on the ol' CC statement. Last one I negotiated was at the end of last year or so. A HOS 92 in 7.5. Those little buggers have gotten spendy!

Neat story: In 2007, I was bidding on ComicLink for a Batman #6 in 9.0. My wife was sitting right next to me and we shared the moment together. She was so psyched. At closing, I had the highest bid! Said I won! And then, another bid was accepted after the bell. We were so pissed off. I even called CLINK the next day asking "wtEFF?" They had no real answer. Bottom line was I was beat out by $10. Last time I participated in an online auction.

[Robot Man]

4 hours ago, Westy Steve said:

I've collected stuff as long as I've been with my wife.  In the beginning, I'd characterize her as "putting up with it".  But she's seen first-hand that when the fecal matter hits the whirligig, I will not hesitate to sell things for the betterment of our family.  I've sold stuff to stabilize our rental property empire and to buy a car for one of the kids who needed it.  Again, no regrets.

Lately, she's seen first-hand that my collecting is large enough and old enough that they are virtually self-sustaining.  I can sell things that I bought a long time ago to fund new purchases and their appreciation/growth more than makes up for the transaction costs.  She gets that.  The collection improves over time with much effort, but not much money.

Along the way, I invested the kids savings accounts into collectibles.  She noticed that the kids got great returns on their money.  I just sold an ASM 238, CGC 9.6 that I bought 5 years ago...do the math on that one!  Two of my kids had half interest in it, and with half the proceeds, the older kid got a computer for college and the younger kid's proceeds were invested into a nice looking Flash 123 that will be sold in 2 years when she hits college.

Very recently, she's seen the ridiculous price runs in our hobby and she's been exceptionally supportive, even recommending I "hurry up and pay my layaway stuff off" to lock it away.  Not saying that I had any qualms about the integrity of the sellers, who were sterling sellers.

My collection has always funded our life. Many years ago to buy our first house, I sold off most of my GA keys. Bat 1, Supe 1, Cap 1, More Fun 52 and more. When my kids went to college off went most of my SA keys. I have replaced a few of them but never had any regrets. I plan to sell off a bunch of other stuff soon once the pandamic is over to take my family and grandkids to Hawaii. This past year has shown me what is really important in life. 

[kav]

4 minutes ago, Randall Ries said:

I'll "never know how a woman feels". I answer proudly and loudly "Oh yes I DO! I know how it feels to go 8 weeks without giving snu-snu one SECOND of thought!" LOL!

I know how my one GF felt-she felt that she could like go to an auto repair shop and they would repair her car for free.  She got tons of free stuff.

[Randall Ries]

7 minutes ago, DavidTheDavid said:

I had my first and only kid two months before I turned 42. No way I'd recommend that. Definitely wish I'd had him sooner. Everything would be easier if we'd done that. At this point in my life, now 49, I want my limited time and energy back, not to mention money. At my current age, my parents had my sister and me in college. I'll be 60 when mine goea to college. Way better to start earlier.

I was twenty when my first son was born. The downside to that is I was nowhere near ready emotionally to be a father. It was really, really hard. Because when we are on the other end of that spectrum, we still feel like we got a lotta livin' to do and this homunculus is preventing me from doing it. We still have that youthful energy and curiosity. Hey sorry. Not too many 20 year olds actually plan to have kids, you know? Maybe the best time to have kids is in our early thirties. By the time we are 50, they will be 20 and then it's time to get out of my house while I still have some years left. Even then, at 50, you can really feel it. I thought I was tired when I was 25. I was not. Not like this. My oldest son will be 40. Remarkable how time went by so fast.

[DavidTheDavid]

2 minutes ago, Randall Ries said:

I was twenty when my first son was born. The downside to that is I was nowhere near ready emotionally to be a father. It was really, really hard. Because when we are on the other end of that spectrum, we still feel like we got a lotta livin' to do and this homunculus is preventing me from doing it. We still have that youthful energy and curiosity. Hey sorry. Not too many 20 year olds actually plan to have kids, you know? Maybe the best time to have kids is in our early thirties. By the time we are 50, they will be 20 and then it's time to get out of my house while I still have some years left. Even then, at 50, you can really feel it. I thought I was tired when I was 25. I was not. Not like this. My oldest son will be 40. Remarkable how time went by so fast.

I wasn't emotionally ready at 41... Parenting is tough.

[Randall Ries]

6 minutes ago, kav said:

I know how my one GF felt-she felt that she could like go to an auto repair shop and they would repair her car for free.  She got tons of free stuff.

Ehhh. Free auto repair or like free samples of turkey kielbasa at the Piggly Wiggly? I mean, I was a sucker for a pretty face and a shot at the ta-ta's when I was young and they knew it. A waitress was like a stripper when I was young. Lean over me to pick up my plate and give me a nice long show as she "fumbled" with the silverware and I threw dollar bills at her. Women today say they hate the leering and I get that. I believe them. But they also know how to use their "charms" to get what they want. I think it's genetic. No, really. I think it is.

My own DAUGHTER at 4 years old wanted something. A toy or whatever. She actually struck a flirtatious pose I have seen grown women use and said "Can I PLEEEAASE, Daddy?" It was the creepiest and most hilarious thing I'd ever seen. She still didn't get what she wanted because by then I hated being played at all. But I was amazed how naturally it came to her.

[lotofsilver]

Favorite scent: Old comics

Second Favorite scent:

[Randall Ries]

7 minutes ago, DavidTheDavid said:

I wasn't emotionally ready at 41... Parenting is tough.

It can be, yes. We think comic book negotiations are hard? Try co-parenting with another human being that has a different idea about how to raise a kid.

I was the fun Dad. I used to play hard with all my kids. I would sit my oldest son (he was about 1.5 years old at the time) on the refrigerator, then I would sit on the floor. I'd look up at him and clap and say "Come on!" He couldn't talk at the time but he knew what I wanted him to do. The first time I did that, I saw the light go on in his little brain. He started giggling and began scootching his butt to the edge of the top of the refrigerator. "COME ON!", I said. And with a giggle and a screech, DOWN HE CAME!

Well, sir. He LOVED that. I caught him easily and I can honestly say I never dropped any of my kids. That was verboten. And he struggled to get out of my arms and lurch to the refrigerator and clawed at it. He wanted more! LOL! So, we did more. Several more. Until.....

She had finally began to wonder what all the clapping , screeching and giggling was all about and she appeared in the room when young Cabbagehead was halfway down to me. She screamed and tried to catch him, not realizing I was on it and she was messing up the rhythm. So, I got an earful while my son lost his temper because we weren't playing anymore.

But you know. I have a thousand stories like that. We had fun and it built up a trust in all of them. Daddy might let you fall but he won't let you get hurt. And there was a certain amount of jealousy with the wives. ("Why do YOU get to be the fun one and I have to be the mean one?") I dunno. Be the fun one too! Quit with the stickin' yer butt and lighten up!

And too: Times have changed. I tell those stories and people have actually gotten upset. Fathers have gotten upset. "How abusive!" "How mean!" "Don't you think you were taking chances with your kids safety?" Well? I don't know. My kids grew up strong and confident.

[Lurker89]

8 minutes ago, DavidTheDavid said:

I wasn't emotionally ready at 41... Parenting is tough.

I hear you ... And second that.

I'm happy we started when we did because there is no such thing as being ready for the journey that is parenthood. Being 29 when we started puts us on a favorable timeline  I think. We love each other to death and our daughter is the light of our life. Like everyone else we struggle internally and interpersonally, the days are long and the years are short at this stage of life. The trials of adulthood can be unimaginable.

[Randall Ries]

12 minutes ago, lotofsilver said:

Favorite scent: Old comics

Second Favorite scent:

Oh MAN. I disagreed with my first divorce. My second one was like getting my drivers license. I kept that stack of paperwork for YEARS. Just to have.

[kav]

25 minutes ago, Randall Ries said:

Free auto repair or like free samples of turkey kielbasa at the Piggly Wiggly?

Free auto repair.  Repeatedly.  Thousands of dollars worth of work.  She tried to tell me "oh they do that for everyone"
After we broke up she screwed the pooch tho taking her new BF there to get free work.They had enough of her after that.
Dummies thought they couldget some action by kissin a***.  Thats not how it works boys.  you go straight in the chump zone.

[oakman29]

I told my wife of 25 years that I came into this relationship with my comics, and they will still be here after she leaves. After that the wife hasn't said a word about them.

[kav]

1 minute ago, oakman29 said:

I told my wife of 25 years that I came into this relationship with my comics, and they will still be here after she leaves. After that the wife hasn't said a word about them.

In fact no one's heard from her in years-  

Edited April 23, 2021 by kav

[oakman29]

Just now, kav said:

In fact no one's heard from her in years-  

I am an exterminator after all. 😏

[kav]

2 minutes ago, oakman29 said:

I am an exterminator after all. 😏

Terminator calls oak when he needs 'removal'-

[kav]

Oakman's favorite astronaut-Buzz Aldrin.